Last Letter to my Mom

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by ansdr, Dec 12, 2010.

  1. ansdr

    ansdr Well-Known Member

    I'm going to be turning myself into jail in a couple of days. I won't say for what, but it's what I want. Here is my final letter to my mother, let me know what you think. :rolleyes:

    Dear Mom,

    I know you may not understand why I chose to do what I chose to do. You should know that I love and care for you very much, and I care for all the pets too. I chose to do this because I was broken. And nothing and no one could help me. I spent my whole life liking girls, wasting them on trying to find one. But I never accepted that none of them would like me. Girls are just not the way you think they are anymore. And I wanted to show that to you. I also wanted to do this because, you have been on this earth for so long. You spent so many years living for me. But All I ever did was disappoint myself, my life, a waste. It's time to live your life Mom. I want nothing but happiness for you because it's not about me. Let me go. It's okay, i'll be fine. Move Away. Take all the money I have, and buy yourself a new VCR. I love you very much Mom, I always have, and I always will. It's time to forfill all the dreams you wanted to. Life goes by fast, so fast that you forget that it's going buy. But it's going by all too fast for you. You should be able to find a husband. I have time, but my time isn't now. So please, atleast for me, live your life. All I want is for you to be truly happy for Christmas.
  2. oval

    oval Well-Known Member

    your mom would most likely be the happiest if you were with her and not in jail :sad:
  3. chjones21

    chjones21 Well-Known Member

    I think it is a very sweet letter but I think advice is never usually taken and also maybe I am reading this wrong but if she has only been living her life through you and for you - then she has put a large burden ON you too, somewhere. I hope she takes your advice and then perhaps, you too can be free to start making better decisions for yourself. I've never been to prison, I know one person who has but he doesn't much discuss it but I hope you can find a programme that can help you there - an educational one or a technical training one or simply some professional advice that can help direct you.

    I think you will find that it might be difficult when you come out with a criminal record to access jobs and other things, so be prepared for that but also be aware that there are agencies and charities and all sorts of organisations that are there for exactly that - to help the transition from prison back into civil life. Organisations that will help you find a house, help you with the bureaucracy in initially setting things up, that know of employers who are happy to employ people with a criminal record and give them a second chance. So use all the resources you can to help you both whilst in prison and when you transition out of it ... there are also spiritual courses run in many prisons - such as the Alpha Course and other things that you might want to attend to 'unpack' any issues that are bothering you.

    I don't really know, as I say I have never been to prison and I have never taken an Alpha Course either. I know these things exist and I think you are making the right decision in 'turning yourself in'. I think it is brave and hopefully could turn into a positive turning point for you and the direction of your life.
  4. ansdr

    ansdr Well-Known Member

    Yeah, I'm ready for any of those consequences. By the way I was having a hard time finding a job anyways.:rolleyes: But yes, it has been a burden for me because sometimes my mom expects me to do things I can't. But it's ok. I spent these last days shopping with her and we have been on good terms.