This is the last time I will be here. I can no longer continue to do this it is all just a lie anyway. I lie and say I can be happy, I can make things better if I try. It's all bullshit nothing changes the pain gets worse as time goes on not better, now I am completely alone. Funny I always told ppl I would end up alone and die by myself weird how some things just work out that way. Not really sure why I am even writing this as I will log out and I'm not coming back after that so it isn't like I am expecting ppl to reply or try and help. Must just be that when you finally decide I guess you just want to make sure that you have tied up all the loose ends I don't know and now I just don't care anymore to even think about it. I'm just done fighting for something better that never comes.