Last reason gone....

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by carekitty, Dec 29, 2009.

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  1. carekitty

    carekitty Guest

    I've considered suicide for some time. I have it all planned out, down to the very last detail. Nice to be organised, I guess.....

    One thing has kept me from doing it. My son. Tonight, I had another huge fight with my husband. We have an awful marriage, but he won't let me go, long story.

    It's ruining my son's life, who is living with us. Tonight he said he'd rather we all lived apart, because he can't take the fighting anymore. He can't live on his own, and I can't take him with me, no money and I'm ill.

    I thought if I stayed, it would be better for him, but it's not. There's no other way out, so I'll take the one way I have. I'm tired of hurting and being ill. It's funny, but the emotional pain and anguish is actually much worse than the physical pain I have because of my illnesses. I want peace. God, I just want peace.

    I've only posted a few times, and everyone has been so nice. I'm sorry I haven't posted more, but I've been in such a dark place, I just didn't know what to say to help others.

    Just wanted to thank everyone here. You're all very nice.

    I hope there's something on the other side. Goodbye.
  2. wheresmysheep

    wheresmysheep Staff Alumni

    you dont have to do this, your son will be without a mother, no matter whats going on thats never good. stay for him
  3. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    Why not see if you interact more here whether some of the darkness will lift...also, what kind of treatment are you receiving for your pain? big hugs. J
  4. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Please keep posting keep talking so we can help. Your son will only suffer if you commit sucide he will blame himself in some way. He will also be prone to suicide himself as you will have taught him that the only way to cope is to take easy way out. Have you tried family councilling together try to work it out. No matter what your son will always need his mother always Please continue to vent release your pain but don't pass your pain onto your son just don't do that.
  5. bubblin girl

    bubblin girl Well-Known Member

    i totally agree...he will absolutely blam please dont do it. :hug:
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