Let it go

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by MoAnamCara, Apr 7, 2013.

  1. MoAnamCara

    MoAnamCara SF Artist

    Am trying to let go of so many things.

    Of things that will never be.
    Of people that will never be what I need them to be in my life.
    Of those that hurt me. Intentionally or Unintentionally.
    Of memories, lots of hurtful memories.
    Of mistakes I've made.
    Of sadness, anger, grief, lonliness etc.

    I'd like to let go of caring.

    Caring that others care.
    Caring that others are there for me.
    Caring about what others think.
    Caring and worrying about others when it simply isn't reciprocated.
    Caring takes up so much energy, but the way I care isn't a healthy way. It can preoccupy me and cause much worry.

    I'd like to let go of any hope.

    I'm not sure I have much to start with.
    But can't I just say - it is what it is.
    Quit trying & falling, trying, falling, trying, falling...
    Either accept what is or do something about it. In a positive or negative way.

    I'd really like to let go of being scared.

    Scared of just being.
    Of noises, loudness, things out of the blue.
    Of people startling me, of being on edge.
    Of feeling frightened.

    I'd also like to just let go.
    To be free.

    Free of so much that I carry around with me, day in and day out.
    Why can't it go, why can't I let it go?
    What good does it do?
    To have this weight, darkness and fear follow me and be with me and within me?

    Yes - to be free. Truly free.

    I'm so tired of "this". :(

    Overwhelming sadness, overwhelming life.
  2. morning rush

    morning rush Well-Known Member

    wow I totally relate to this...there came a point where I had to let go of a lot of things, and you know what? I felt a lot better afterwards...instead of giving to others, I gave to myself...
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hugs to you
  4. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Eccentric writer, general weirdo, heedless heathen

    I feel a lot like this right now. I'm so sorry that you feel this way :hug: I hope your situation will get better soon.
  5. MoAnamCara

    MoAnamCara SF Artist

    Thank you :grouphug:
  6. Theodora

    Theodora Well-Known Member

    Oh Mo, you were writing for yourself yet it has echoes for many of us. Hoping so very much that you are able to use your perception and loving care to benefit yourself.
  7. MoAnamCara

    MoAnamCara SF Artist

    Thanks Theodora. I fear it unlikely.
  8. Theodora

    Theodora Well-Known Member

    Unlikely means it might be possible for you. Some of that loving kindness directed back at yourself. Some of that perception helping you out of the current abyss.
  9. Much afraid

    Much afraid Well-Known Member

    I agree ~ the roller coaster continues to run. Looking for less overwhelming and fewer climbs and drops (for both of us).
  10. MoAnamCara

    MoAnamCara SF Artist

    Thank you... I hope it ceases for us all, too.