Don't you know I'm trying the hardest I can? Its not just affecting you, but me too. I swear I'm trying. Theres a lot on my shoulders to juggle and I'm finding it harder to keep my head above water but I'm trying. Yes I'm struggling but you don't seem to see that. No one does. The wonderful family has done what? zip. I'm sure thats my fault too, because people assume I can manage all of this. I could have, perhaps, at one point. But not right now. I don't need people saying I can call on them whenever and then when I ask, not being there. Seriously? You know how hard it is for me to reach out, to put myself out there? But nope, no word for weeks. And yet, you know if you needed it, I'd be right there with support for you and would do whatever I could to help. I am tired. Exhausted after yesterday. Too emotional. Lonely and adrift.