I'm living my life and gaining no happiness out of it. I feel guilty because i understand the gift of life but i feel out of place, like i was given this gift but with no way of using it. I see everyone else and feel envious of their happiness, how they can be so optimistic. I was suffering with depression when i was in my teens and i thought it was part of 'growing up' now i'm 21 and nothing has changed, well, it changed when i found someone. I was in a long term relationship that has recently ended and she saved my life. I was in a real bad way and she made me feel worthy and useful, to an extent, i was still unsatisfied with life, but she did help me a lot. Now that is over i don't know what to do, i thought i could take all she taught me and live my life normally, but now everything is exactly the same as if i never met her, i feel the same burden of life as i did when i was younger. If anyone feels similar to me, please contact me so we can chat, i need someone who understands me, i feel so alone.