Don't anybody else ever feel that we're trapped in this world and all we're just being punished all the bloody time. Can't kill myself cause I've had one shocker of a NDE so no going there and it's against my religion as well. So just keep on existing, I don't have a life so I only exist. So I find love and guess what the only thing I get from it is endless suffering. Love is just a creatve way to hurt people. Why does it even exist? Hell, if I could just switch it on and off or at least control for whom I have the feeling I would have been happy. But no: I fall in love with someone that feels absolutely nothing for me, or at least not the same way. I'm bloody trapped in this world I cannot escape!!!!! Why the hell do I have to go through this? I can't bloody switch it off and I can't do anything about it!!!!!! "Love is the best thing that can happen to you. If it's between the right two people it's the most wonderful thing there is....blah blah blah" is something someone told me! BS I say. There is no such person as the right one!!! You have to make it work! I'm willing why ain't she? Why is God punishing me like this?