Life keeps getting harder

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Dagreat21, Jul 19, 2015.

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  1. Dagreat21

    Dagreat21 New Member

    So, back in May my wife and I were expecting our first child. It took nearly 12 month for us to get pregnant. My wife was 13 weeks along when we lost the child. It was heart wrenching. I wasn't allowed to take off from work because my boss said we were short staffed. I made a few mistakes during this time and was fired last week for those mistakes. I am now miserable. My wife and I had a strained relationship before and now there is talk of divorce because she is upset that I was fired at fault. I am losing faith in the whole "everything happens for a reason" and honestly just keep wondering if it is time to call it quits. I know my wife would be taken care of with the life insurance and really I'm not bringing much to the table anyways at this point. She is young enough where she could still find someone and have a successful marriage and children. I'm almost 31 and keep wondering when my hard work will pay off. Every time I make a step forwards I'm pushed 2 steps back. Instead of just losing a child that we tried so hard for, I also lost my job and may not be eligible for unemployment. I've don everything right in life with going to college, working hard, buying a house, getting married, etc. I've got friends and family that abuse the system and are in better spots than I am. Any advice on how to shake this feeling?
  2. Bitterwood

    Bitterwood Member

    Hello there,

    I am not married, nor will I pretend to know what losing a child feels like. It must surely be terribly painful and draining. You said you are 31. I don't think that's actually old at all. You're still a young man and I believe there is plenty of time for you to maybe repair your relationship with your wife, or maybe start anew if it comes to that. Life nowadays can be really hard for the so called "working man". I am sorry to hear you got fired because of mistakes you probably made just because of stress or grief. I believe the first thing you should do in that department is NOT blame yourself for losing your job. If it was anybody's fault, it was your employer for not understanding your very difficult condition. Either way, that's already done and dealt with, so like I said, you really shouldn't beat yourself up for it.

    I do agree and I think most people on this forum or in general will simpathize with you finding life's hardships unendurable at certain points. Yes, those who cheat their way through the system will usually get better payoffs when they have their way BUT you should also remember that when they fail they get screwed hard, whereas you get to keep trying. In some ways, in im the same boat as you. I went to school, did college too, tried to be fair and treat people as decently as I could (or thought they each deserved). I am in pain most of the time. Pain from being alive, pain from being lonely, pain for not being understood. There's things we all gotta endure and some have it easier than others.

    I don't know if my words helped or not. I just wanted to say SOMETHING (hopefully helpful) because I know sometimes its better to say anything at all than just ignore a person in need. Try to hold on. There's a reason the expression "hitting rock bottom" exists. After a certain point it won't get any worse :). But even in your situation, try and take each day one at a time. Compartmentalize your problems and work on each separately. That way, when you solve one, itll feel like you accomplished something :)

    Wish you all the best.
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