life with no parole(otherwise known as SF)

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by elleanne, Oct 18, 2009.

  1. elleanne

    elleanne Well-Known Member

    I can see that this forum is helpful for many of you.
    However, I made a mistake by joining it. I realised that, but cannot close my account. WTF? I have made some posts that might not be very nice (I`m not a very nice person). Don`t take it personally.
    I just need my account to be closed, and it looks like the only way that can be done is by being rude / offensive / inappropriate.
     
  2. Aurora Gory Alice

    Aurora Gory Alice Well-Known Member

    Well by being rude, offensive and inappropriate you are causing harm to others. And that is just selfish. So why not ask nicely (the mods) for your account to be closed.
     
  3. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Hi Elleanne,

    You can ask a moderator for your account to be placed ''on leave''. It's a temporary ban of the forums and chat :hug:
     
  4. elleanne

    elleanne Well-Known Member

    I already did ask, and was told that accounts cannot be closed.
    I have been honest. If you percieve that as rude, offensive or inappropriate. I am not responsible for your perceptions.
     
  5. elleanne

    elleanne Well-Known Member

    I dont want to be `on leave`. I want the account closed.
     
  6. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    The admins have never closed an account upon request(to my knowledge).
    Not that this matters but being rude and making inappropriate posts won't lead you to a closed account, you'd be placed under moderation where everything you post will have to be approved first.

    You haven't been here very long, give us a chance , this site may help you like its helped many people like you :) :hug:
     
  7. elleanne

    elleanne Well-Known Member

    I don`t want help-why is that so hard to understand?
    My life is my responsibility. If I wanted help, I`d help myself. I do not expect or want anyone else to do that for me.
    As you said, I have`nt been here very long, so how do you know what I`m like? One person has made a very valid judgement of me here, by saying that I am selfish. Others have tried to see the good in me, by offering me support. I may not be like all the other people like me, and just want to be allowed to do what should be a fairly simple thing, like close an account?
    But, no. I am a poor little victim of my own mental health, and need saving. That appears to be the the ethos, here.
    If this was the mental health act, I`d be allowed to appeal it.
    I`m happy for you all to carry on as you are (it seems to be very good for many of the members).
     
  8. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    I have`nt been here very long, so how do you know what I`m like?

    If you're here , you're suffering in some way. Most of the people here are suffering too. That's all I meant.

    I'm curious, why don't you want help?
     
  9. Robin

    Robin Guest

    The purpose of the site has never been to save anyone, have always been terrified of the arrogance and the complacency that any such mission ultimately adopts. It's true, what you do with your life is your choice and I will not take that choice away from you though I will not encourage it, in the mean time, you are welcome to stay and tell us about yourself, to write anything that does not promote harm, for yourself or others. You have words that have never be said and cannot be spoken by anyone else, nor will they be able to speak for you in the future.

    I have taken a peak at your posts and there is nothing but pain, wisdom and insight there, insight enough perhaps to help someone leave behind the hell they are living now for good.

    There is only one you and perhaps that is a blessing, a blessing for those that do not have to walk in your shoes and a blessing for those whose path crosses yours. Regardless of your self loathing, you are as precious as the rarest flower and you will never be again and although many cannot help themselves, nor want help, they find a great sense of peace to help others.
     
  10. elleanne

    elleanne Well-Known Member

    yay, I can be a martyr for the miserable.:pope:
     
  11. Robin

    Robin Guest

    I don't like to compare the suffering of others and imply who suffers the most or least, but given the choice I would quake to have to live your life but nonetheless, helping others when I couldn't help myself gave me a sense of martyrdom, though am too embarrassed to say why but will in pm if you are really curious.

    Would make sense if when you came to be born you chose to earn a kind word and a sense of peace, the standards of some are nothing short of astronomical and maybe when you are ready that's where you will rest :)
     
  12. elleanne

    elleanne Well-Known Member

    People in Darfur are suffering (what I call suffering). Do they have the luxury of food, clothing and water? No. The few lucky ones do, but they certainly don`t have and probably don`t want people sitting with them in their misery, awaiting death.
    OK, an extreme example, but my `issues` are very much self inflicted, and my inaction has made them worse. No one made me miserable - I did it all by myself.
    Why don`t I want help? Because I have had all the help I could ever want / need. It did`nt help, though. I am just yet another miserable person posting yet another miserable message on a suicide forum.
     
  13. Robin

    Robin Guest

    I wasn't aware anyone has ever made the rational choice to become anorexic, or suffer for any reason that matter. Are you religious at all? Feel guilty or inadequate by your own standards? These are not questions I am seeking answers from you unless you wish to give them but what happens or what must happen to a person to make them want to suffer? And did their free will choose to suffer or do they suffer an ailment that makes them feel they need to suffer?

    I hear from many depressed people that they are worthless, have no hope and should pay for all the evil deeds they have committed not just in the past but in past lives too. I have also heard those that were depressed that say they cannot believe how happy they have become, am not saying you are wrong in that you believe that you will always suffer only that while we live and breath we have choices.

    Am not going to insult your intelligence by trying to convince you that tomorrow you could have an epiphany and you will go on to become the first president of the world or something of that kind, but I will leave you to consider any other possibility.
     
  14. KirstyMissJimBob

    KirstyMissJimBob Well-Known Member

    i have an idea..maybe dont log back on to SF, act like ur account doesnt exist.
     
  15. Aurora Gory Alice

    Aurora Gory Alice Well-Known Member

    Exactly. Ditto the above - Kirsty. I don't get why that is so difficult for you?
     
  16. Robin

    Robin Guest

    Well, there is a reason why members dislike it but I will not share that reason with anyone :p
     
  17. elleanne

    elleanne Well-Known Member

    Good idea. I wish I`d thought of that, all by myself.
    No?
    OK, I`ll explain.
    It is not difficult for me. I just happen to believe in freedom of choice. Choice to do what you so thoughtfully suggested, or to close the account.
    As I am sure you have experienced, automated messages are emailed to me every so often from SF. It is the email address I have had for years, and the one my mother and sister would look in for any pointers to my death they may have missed. I am trying to do everything in my power to prevent them discovering any more ugly truths about me. Having been bereaved by suicide, I know that this is commonly done by grieving families.
     
  18. Robin

    Robin Guest

    There's an option for me to change your email without you having to go through the hassle of sabotaging it yourself, I can also, if you prefer, prevent any email from being sent to you. Lastly, if there is any identifiable information in your posts am willing, if you provide links, to remove said information and maybe the odd whole post.

    As for choice, you have not answered whether this is choice or symptom.
     
  19. elleanne

    elleanne Well-Known Member

    Do whatever you want to. My wants clearly don`t matter at all in the matter.
     
  20. Robin

    Robin Guest

    You've mentioned why you wish your account closed and I have addressed those reasons without opening the floodgates for everyone who reaches rock bottom to demand their account be closed .. or worse, all their posts deleted.

    I have answered the want, am offering to help the need but the question remains, choice or symptom?