Hello folks, I'm not sure how to start, but maybe backward is best. I'm new, and I'm here because I feel like my support network is out of reach for me at the moment. I've spent many years struggling to find the footing in society which seems to come so naturally to others. It always feels a little dissonant to reach out for help to avoid my own suicide, because, as I am certain everyone who experiences these emotions knows, the desires are real, and they're genuine. Yet despite the pull in that direction, there are factors holding me back---not the least of which is the persistent, perhaps even nagging, hope that, one day, I will feel better. Not perfect---no, not "well"---but better...and maybe I will find that elusive foothold after all. I am known for my verbosity at times, so I'll try to keep my posts as short as I can while maintaining the spirit of the ideas they contain.