So on the 17th of last month i tried and obviously failed to end my life. Honestly as bad as it sounds i am glad that it hapened because it lead to me getting the help i needed and set up a support group. I spent two days in the hospital and then two weeks in a psyc hospital and while there i found out that i am not only dealing with depression but also bipolar 1 dissorder. So thru the unfourtunate act of attemting suicide i am doing much better and for the first time in many years i can honestly say that i can get thru this life, and can handle all it will throw at me, with some help granted but still everybody needs some help at one time or another. Oh by the way im sorry if i mislead anyone by the 17th posting or give the wrong idea here.