Lonely and scared..

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by emma_x, Dec 15, 2010.

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  1. emma_x

    emma_x Member

    In a follow up from this post; http://www.suicideforum.com/showthread.php?t=91206

    Well after 3 weeks of on and off not talking, just the occassional text, a basic msn convo...
    Nothing has changed!
    I'm seeing him friday, its still a 'break' but it feels so bleak. He says he still loves me but I don't know how long I have to wait for him. I'd wait for him forever... but I feel this horrible feeling every day that he'll move on to someone less serious or more fun.

    I just want things to go back to the way they used to be when he'd give me a big hug and I would feel loved and happy for days. He says during this break we should be like friends... I don't understand breaks but I can't see him as a friend. Hes my soulmate and my love! We used to talk about getting married and 'forever and always'
    Its just all too much, I am taking pills now, but I still feel without a dought if he moved on I would commit suicide.

    Even if I don't get replies to this its good to get it all off my chest..
     
  2. Serbian

    Serbian Active Member

    Emma, I doubt I have anything to say to put you at ease with, but please understand that you're #1, killing yourself because of a breakup shouldn't be a solution.
     
  3. me myself and i

    me myself and i Account Closed

    Relationships are never set in stone, lifes just not like that.
    Although it hurts so much, i prefer not to be married to the mother of my children, than be with her. Not because i did not love her, i did with all my heart. But she did not want me, so only rejection, heartache and eventually seperation was bound to occur.
    It is better to be in my own company than be with someone who does not want the same as me.
    Life moves on and so can you.
    Hang around please, many here share your hurt, post a little, listen a little, maybe some answers will come and find you.
    Regards Pete
     
  4. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    I think that when someone is suicidal when their partner leaves, it usually means that you have a problem that you haven't resolved. It might seem like everything was fine when you were together with your boyfriend, but if there is a part of you that needs to heal that hasn't, then I think that it is something that may have affected the relationship may be part of the reason why he wanted spend some time just as friends.

    I think when someone is in a relationship, but would colapse if that realtionship ended, that is something that their bf/gf picks up on, and it tends to undermine the relationship.

    Getting to a place where both of you can be with your bf because you want to be with him rather than needing him to survive seems like it would be the best thing in and of itself, as well as the path most likely to lead to a lasting relationship.

    Your being back on meds seems like a good start. Some therapy might be good too. Aside from just general psychotherapy, you might want to see a relationship councilor.

    I think their might be some rape survivor groups that might be good for you too.

    Building supportive friendships might help you not rely so much on your relationship with your bf.

    I hope that things can work out!!!!!


    Love and best wishes to you!
     
  5. novecento

    novecento Member

    I can see it in your eyes
    You need a friend tonight
    'Cause someone broke your heart in two
    You need a volunteer
    To wipe away your tears
    Someone who will resue you

    Your whole world is tumbling down
    Can't get your feet on solid ground
    You're looking for someone
    Someone you know, you can count on

    I'll rise to the occasion
    Help me through the situation
    I'll be your inspiration
     
  6. black orchid

    black orchid Well-Known Member

    I used to love this song once
     
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