So tonight I was playing Call of Duty, and paired up with these three guys in a round of Warzone.
They were all talking on the mic to one another and mentioning personal things about themselves to one another, because obviously they knew each other.
It felt almost intrusive, like I was listening in on a phone conversation, or something.
But I also felt... this sense of being involved? Like not as lonely, because I was in this simulation with other real people who were interacting with one another.
I guess I realized that my existence is so isolating, that I found it comforting to be listening to three guys complaining about their wives while playing a game.
I have always had this contradiction, where I craved social interaction, yet when I got it, loathed it, and yearned to get back to my little cell of solitude.
There's a lyric from a song I always liked, that goes: "I don't wanna be lonely, I just wanna be alone".
Anyone else get what I'm trying to say?
I love being alone a lot, but deep down there is this desire for communion and intimacy with someone else.
They were all talking on the mic to one another and mentioning personal things about themselves to one another, because obviously they knew each other.
It felt almost intrusive, like I was listening in on a phone conversation, or something.
But I also felt... this sense of being involved? Like not as lonely, because I was in this simulation with other real people who were interacting with one another.
I guess I realized that my existence is so isolating, that I found it comforting to be listening to three guys complaining about their wives while playing a game.
I have always had this contradiction, where I craved social interaction, yet when I got it, loathed it, and yearned to get back to my little cell of solitude.
There's a lyric from a song I always liked, that goes: "I don't wanna be lonely, I just wanna be alone".
Anyone else get what I'm trying to say?
I love being alone a lot, but deep down there is this desire for communion and intimacy with someone else.
I'd recommend a real game like Fallout: New Vegas (10/10), Skyrim (10/10), Hatred (10/10), Chivalry: medieval warfare (10/10), GTA V (10/10), GTA IV (10/10), Saint's row the third (10/10), can't think of any more.