For the past 4 years now I have been depressed and I think its mainly due to the fact that I am very lonely. I mean yes there has been some events in my past to contribute to my depression but coping with it alone just makes it worse. I do have friends but they are not people I can talk to my depression with they don't really understand it. It has just been worse for me lately as my bday was a couple of days ago and it just made me think about my ex a lot and how she would always be there to cheer me up and keep me company. Also one of my friends well I don't think I can consider him a friend any more was supposed to come over for a little gathering with some other friends yesterday but said he was sick when he was in fact sleeping with a girl I dated in the beginning of this year. It is actually pathetic that every night before I go to sleep I say good night to my ex in my head thats how insane I think I am going from being so lonely. I am so depressed everyday most of the day and its just getting harder to cope. I don't want to end my life but is it really worth living if I feel the same everyday ?