I think I may be in a long distance relationship with my friend of seven years. God, seven years we've known each other...he knows everything about me, literally everything. He was there for me when I first started getting flashbacks, when I was going through my first relationships, when I went through the rape last year. He was the one who helped me realize I've got depression, he was the one who I turned to when I had questions about the boys I was dating, he was the one who I would message late at night crying when I wanted to be cheered up. He put up with me dealing with N's shit, he has been there for me so, so much the last seven years, he's been the one constant throughout everything. I went on Skype with him today, and we hadn't really spoken since I first told him about the shit I was dealing with when staying with my sister, and I told him about Sunday and about how I started self harming. He made me promise that if I felt like ODing again to message him and get a "M____ OD" which made me laugh so much. He kept saying how cute my smile is, and how adorable it is that I blush and get shy about the most casual things. We're planning to meet up in a few months, as America is a long way to go. New York, to be exact. But I can wait. I've wanted to meet him since I first started talking to him, I even daydreamed about the day when I would. What would we do when we first met each other at the airport, the trip back to his, the first meal we'd have, and sleeping in his arms. I think I know who I'll be dreaming about tonight.