long, long rant...IM SORRY!!!

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by *dilligaf*, Sep 11, 2006.

  1. *dilligaf*

    *dilligaf* Staff Alumni

    sorry about this there's just some things i have to get off my chest....

    for those of you that don't know..my nan is dying and i'm helping to care for here..have gone part-time at work etc so i can be here. (touchwood) she's doing fine at the moment but we dont know how long for. she has 4 grown-up children. at the moment none of them seem to be helping me very much.

    my uncle..nans youngest son..came in today and told me he is applying for a job...IN SCOTLAND!!! Other ebd of the country. his mum is dying and he wants to move to Scotland and leave..well, me..to deal with it. all im doing im trying to do for my nan..to keep her happy. can he not see that she needs her children around her. what about the last few days etc..whjat if he doesnt get back here in time. the other 3 children are no help..and dontthink they ever will be but i stupidly thought i might be able to rely on him later on.

    starting to wonder if im the only one that cares about my nan...if im the only one that cares about me.

    i dont know what to do..i cant say anything to anyone becuase i told him something today that i dont want anyone to know..if i tell he will. im confused. does he not know what he'll do to her if he leaves????

    and then..just to top it all off..he said to me "you're not doing anything stupid are you? have not seen you in short sleeves for ages..are you cutting? id break both ur legs if you were (he was laughing at this..but still)" obviously i denied it..i have been doing really well but ended up doing it this morning because of al of this.

    i dont know whether to bemore annoyed with him or myself

    sorry for the long rant!! :wallbash:
     
  2. wienerman

    wienerman Guest

    hun, you and i both know that there are many people that care for you, whether it be in real life or online. there is nothing that you can do to stop your uncle and other family members from doing what they want, however you are so brame to be taking on the responcablility that you have with your nan. i know oyu try your hardest and you are a great carer for her.

    as for your uncle, that has to be one of the most stupid comments ever, that is very insensitive of him to say such a thing, and you have had a set back. however i know you are strong and can keep on going without cutting again for a longer period of time.
     
  3. *dilligaf*

    *dilligaf* Staff Alumni

    thanx for that wienerman.

    i dont suppose there IS much i can do to stop him..i just wish he'd think of my nan and not himself!
     
  4. Marshmallow

    Marshmallow Staff Alumni

    hey, sounds like your going thru a rough time at the moment, personally i think that you uncle hasn't come to terms with your nan dying, maybe he wasn't to move away so he doesn't have to see her die, many people react in differnet ways when they find out a loved one is dying, and i agree that maybe he should think of your nan at this time.

    And i wanna say what your doing for your nan right now is very admirable! and i wish all the support for your family during this very difficult time

    and no need to say sorry for the rant, thats what SF if for :)

    take care of yourself

    vikki x
     
  5. TLA

    TLA Antiquitie's Friend

    I agree with vicki, people act selfish and stupid when dealing with death. Mostly, cuz they do not know how to deal with "issues".
    My sister is a nurse and she never visited my grandfather when he was getting on in age. My grandmother would ask her, cuz she only lived 15 minutes away. After he dies she has a large picture on her coffee table of him. too weird!! People handle it their way. Go figure.
    Keep posting and keep your cool. you are really stepping up when others are too self absorbed.

    TLA
     
  6. *dilligaf*

    *dilligaf* Staff Alumni

    i hadn't thought of that -vikki- maybe he is trying to pretend it isn't happening. why should i have to though ifhe doesnt...im 19!
    thanx for everything else you said
    sam xx
     
  7. Marshmallow

    Marshmallow Staff Alumni

    I really think that's what he's doing, its hard for anyone to lose their mum, it is extremely hard when you have to watch them die infront of you, and I think it hasn't hit him about what's actually is gonna happen

    maybe sit down and have a chat with him about the situation, and say you need them to support you nan because you can't do it alone

    it must be extremely hard at 19 (im the same age) to deal with someone close to you dying, and I very much admir you for that! if my nan was dying infront of me I wouldn't be able to cope, and if it did happen to me I proberbly would end up doing something serious to myself because I love her that much, stay strong for yourself, your nan and your family
     
  8. *dilligaf*

    *dilligaf* Staff Alumni

    vikki can i PM you to answer that, sorry xx
     
  9. Marshmallow

    Marshmallow Staff Alumni

    sure I'm gonna read the pm now, might take me a long time reply coz I'm on the internet on my since my computer died :( lol
     
  10. me1

    me1 Well-Known Member

    Love u sam, here for u always. Your uncle is being extremely selfish but then that doesn't seem to be anything new where your family are concerned, does it? Plenty of people here care a great deal for u and will support u through anything. One person in particular loves u to bits, you know that? See you soon! :smile:
     
  11. *dilligaf*

    *dilligaf* Staff Alumni

    thanx :) xx