looking for a reason

Discussion in 'Welcome' started by danalss, Apr 28, 2010.

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  1. danalss

    danalss New Member

    HI I'm new to this forum and I've never done anything like this before so I'm not sure how it works.
    I'm a 33 almost 34 year old mother of four stay at home mom, I've been married for 16 years and suffer from deep depression and and severe anxiety. I've been going to psychiatrists for almost 2 years and still have not found the right meds to work for me.

    Its become intolerable to go on and I don't think I care to any longer.
    I have 1 child with diabetes and 1 that is autistic with a mood disorder also.
    The mood disorder comes from my genes and I am told is going to turn into depression or possibly bipolar down the road. I don't think I can bare to see her turn into what I have become.
    I guess I am writing hoping that reading this I will think of my children and change my mind. At this point it seems hopeless and I can't find a reason to hang on any longer.

    I have begun to wish that God would just take me as I am scarred of how I will end things and of my children finding me. If anyone has any thoughts or suggestions please anything would help at this point.
  2. FBD

    FBD Well-Known Member

    if your kids have a chance of going through what youve gone through, youll be able to help them and thats more than most can ever ask for, someone who understands. mental illnesses, like depression, arent always seen as "real diseases" ive heard people myself say that they dont believe it exists, which as someone with depression is hard to hear. theres always something to live for and something that will help, for me im on more than one medication, and the combination makes it more bearable, for me anti depressants just got rid of the physical symptoms, but the emotional stuff, the stuff that hurts the most didnt start to go away until i added another med to help stop the "racing thoughts" also, exercising helps me, theres nothing like going for a run to help clear my mind...there might be an activity that you can do that will help

    but for a reason to stay for now, even if you dont find meds that work is for your kids, if theres a chance theyll have this in the future they need you to help them through, and by then, there will probably be more medical advances to help them
  3. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    I just wanted you to know I've activated your account, and I'm going to move this post to the Welcome forum.
  4. yogurt

    yogurt Active Member

    Hello, dana. I'm new, too.

    Stick around here and keep posting/reading. Maybe talk to some people in chat. It's hard to reach out when you're low but the human contact helps.

    I noticed you mentioned a psychiatrist. Do you also see a therapist?

    Take care of yourself, hon.
  5. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Welcome to the forums!! It took me quite a while to find the right combination of meds that work for me.. I'm on a total of seven meds because of different mental health issues.. I agree that you should try a yherapist.. There good at getting to the root of things and to teach you coping skills..I hope you stcik around and let us support you..Take care...
  6. texaskitty

    texaskitty SF Friend and Antiquities Friend Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Welcome to the SF Forum. You'll find support and encouragement here.
  7. danalss

    danalss New Member

    Thank you for all your responses its nice to know there are others out there that understand about what I'm going through. I was seeing a therapist but it never seemed to do any good but to bring all my pain up with no solution in site. I don't think until my dr finds the right meds for me anything can save me.
    I hold on to a tiny sliver of hope for things to get better.
  8. shamps

    shamps Well-Known Member

    Welcome to Sf sweety.......I hope you will find some comfort here.Just keep talking and reading there are plenty of people here who totally get where you are coming from.:hug:
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