Hi all. Been a while since I posted on here but I remembered this place always gave rational advice so here I am again. I'm in my early 20s now and a lot more content with life. However, I am still really self concious and can be very irrational at times. Anyway... on to my rant. Currently I live in a house with 4 of my closest friends. I would say on the main it was ok and better than living at home because I don't get on with my dad very well. There is one quite big problem though. One of my friends is clinically depressed and has an eating disorder. I love her to bits and would do anything for her... but yesterday she really pushed me to the limits of my patience. I've known this girl for 7 years but since we lived together she has been a real struggle to live with and never confides in me anymore. Basically we were all in the living room having a meal. She hates the way I eat but I honestly can't help it, its just the way I eat. I was already in a bad mood because a friend was being rather annoying at the time, but thats not important. Anyway I was just quietly eating, I try to do this because I'm so self concious she is going to make a comment. I half expect it. Bout 5 mins in the comment comes, "you do realise thats not how you use a fork". Now someone please correct me if I sound out of order, but to me, someone of my age, that comment is highly belittling and pathetic. This was then followed by me saying shut up, because well, thats how I use a fork, I'm not 5 and I certainly can't change 20 years of using it that way. I must emphasise this is a build up of comments where this one was the most ludicrous. She always goes on that I "eat loud" and "don't chew properly and it makes her want to vomit" etc. and that I was "clearly not brought up normally." Maybe I shouldnt take such offence, but as I say, I'm really self concious as it is so don't like having attention drawn my way or being told I'm not normal. Its one of the worst things you can say to me, and she knows that. Someone please tell me I'm not losing it. I can't move out cos living at home is depressing. I want to know if anyone knows how I can combat this in a better way than just telling her to shut up and then eating my food in my room. I did later apologise for telling her to shut up to which, I think, the normal response would be dont worry about it and then a sorry of her own for making the comment... All I got was a "hmmm". She had been in an argumentative mood all day, she gets like that, but when she offended my other housemate he got a unprompted apology within 5 minutes. I didn't even get one after I had apologised. It makes me feel like she just doesnt value my friendship anymore. This is hard to accept because she has been through hard times this year and I stood by her, when she split up with her boyfriend (which is what tipped her over the edge). She is now kinda back together with him and he lives with us too... I have not once tried to ruin that for her because I want her to be happy... even though she has had to lie about the amount and who she slept with when they split up for 2 months. I dont agree with the deception but she is better with him so I let it go. I just wonder what I have to do to gain a little respect, because I don't think I get any for that, or for attempting to show an interest in her life or offering her support with her condition. I just want her to get better... but I don't want that to be at the expense of my own sanity, I am so self concious of myself and what I do because I'm not my biggest fan so incidents like this make me irrational and depressed. If anyone could maybe shead some light on how she might think, that would be good too, maybe then I could understand her a bit better and know what to say. Any questions please ask. I appreciate you reading this. Thanks.