I think when most people look at me, they see a confident person who is in control of his life. On some aspects of that, this is true; I hold down a stable job, I take care of the physical needs of my family. Other than that, nothing holds true. I have been suffering from PTSD all my life, and as of late have tried all therapies out there and currently doing more therapy. I have been close to death's front door on many occassions, not more that I wish to die, but more that I wish to live without the pain that is over me. Yeah, I know probably does not make much sense. I just wish for one good night of sleep, wish just for one days with no flashback memories of my past traumatic history. I am a soldier/a fighter fighting a war within that never ends. I come here looking for solace/peace and nothing more.