Looks VS Personality?

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by Hanging_Hope, Aug 18, 2009.

  1. Hanging_Hope

    Hanging_Hope Active Member

    Well, I was just curious so I decided to make this thread.

    What's more important to you, looks or personality in a relationship? And, would you date someone who was not that good looking, if they were nice, caring and loving?

    I surely wouldn't go for looks instead of personality. Looks are just a plus. If I can't connect with someone, then looks are as good as nothing..Nice-and not so good looking> gorgeous but empty inside.
     
  2. beaglelover

    beaglelover Active Member

    personality is way more important than looks. and if you love the person, they will be attractive--even if only to you. love has a vision all its own.
     
  3. fromthatshow

    fromthatshow Staff Alumni

    For me the two go hand in hand. When I fall in love with someone... it is because our personalities click, but when I find someone's personality attractive, I always find something about their physical apperance attractive. I've never been in a relationship where the two didn't match up. Maybe my mind just sees the beauty in them and automatically I feel physically attracted as well. Don't quite know how it works but it always seems to synch up for me.

    Sorry for the long response. But I do remember one relationship where I didn't find the girl physically attractive. We didn't last for long. We are friends now. Our personalities click but not on a romantic level. And I believe the number one reason I didn't find her physically attractive is because she didn't find herself physically attractive. She thought she was ugly. Maybe in society's standards she wasn't a 10, but I believe that if you are comfortable in your own skin, and if you are not constantly worried that you're ugly... If you find yourself physically attractive you will give off that aura or vibe, whatever you want to call it, and others will pick up on that. It just seems like too much of a coincidence that the one relationship in which the two didn't synch up very much is because the girl thought she was ugly.
     
  4. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    It's all about personality for me, whether we really have a connection. I can't see well enough to know what someone looks like, and in some ways I'm glad because that gives me the opportunity to base everything solely on who they are as a person.
     
  5. cult logic

    cult logic Staff Alumni

    Most people prefer looks, but will tell you they prefer personality.
     
  6. CAD

    CAD Well-Known Member

    Yes, exactly. In all the millions of these identical polls posted on internet forums, the overwhelming answer will be "personality". People simply will not admit how much they value physical appearance. And besides, this simple binary is to neglect other crucial factors like financial situation, and your shifting ideas of what it means to be "attractive".
     
  7. Fimbul

    Fimbul New Member

    Charm, and then a combination of looks and personality. Looks is the thing we get attracted to, but I have yet to meet someone who survives long in a relationship based on looks.

    Also, the old saying "the beauty is in the eye of the beholder" is true.
     
  8. Silvio

    Silvio Well-Known Member

    Personality in relationships, happiness assured if you are with somebody compatible.
    With looks, you just get more attention if you look good, hence in one-night stands people (males especially) are looking for the hottest ones in the club.
    Definitely wouldn't base love on looks alone though.
     
  9. necrodude

    necrodude Well-Known Member

    personality matters more to me. but i also think it matters more than these 2. theres also there actions, such as smoking, drugs, etc. which would influence my choice.
     
  10. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    Agreed, their actions are important to me too.
     
  11. Confusticated

    Confusticated Well-Known Member

    Personality. It just so happens though that she has the most amazing personality you could ever find, and she's also the most beautiful thing you'll ever lay your eyes upon =]
     
  12. Remedy

    Remedy Chat & Forum Buddy

    Personality all the way... the inside really shines through the outside.
     
  13. Rayne

    Rayne Well-Known Member

    Personality.

    But then he's kinda completely perfect.. an amazing guy and incredibly handsome.
     
  14. Jolanta

    Jolanta Member & Antiquitie's Friend Staff Alumni

    [QUOTE I believe that if you are comfortable in your own skin, and if you are not constantly worried that you're ugly... If you find yourself physically attractive you will give off that aura or vibe, whatever you want to call it, and others will pick up on that. It just seems like too much of a coincidence that the one relationship in which the two didn't synch up very much is because the girl thought she was ugly.[/QUOTE]
    Isn't necessarily so. My (now) husband thought I was beautiful when he first met me. I learned to see myself as attractive after we had been married for a while. It took some counseling for PTSD. and depression.
     
  15. Hache

    Hache Well-Known Member

    there could be someone with the perfect personality for you to spend the rest of your life with or have a deep relationship with, if their is no attraction there is no point. Looks help create that attraction, if looks are no good then that person needs a personality that makes them attractive, but being perfect to be with is not necessairly that.

    Looks are good to get the chance to know someone.
     
  16. Brighid Moon

    Brighid Moon Member & Antiquities Friend

    Appearance is the first thing you see in a person (literally!) - you don't see their personality when you walk by them. The second thing you see is their actions (what they are doing at that moment). So appearance has some to do with it, for sure. But if you get to know a person, then personality (and actions/ect.) takes over, and appearance can mean virtually nothing - but there has to be some form of physical attraction in the first place, that's just human nature. And I hate admitting that because I'm one of those people who would love to beleive that only personality counts, but I have to be realistic.
     
  17. Brighid Moon

    Brighid Moon Member & Antiquities Friend

    To qualify the above statement - we all have different physical things which attract us. What attracts one person may not attract another, and what turns one person off may not turn off another. All of this also changes over time, with age and experience.
     
  18. Aurora Gory Alice

    Aurora Gory Alice Well-Known Member

    I've met so many guys who I wasn't initially attracted to, but upon getting to know them I started to fancy them.
    So personality can influence how you see a person - it can change how they 'look' to you.
     
  19. necrodude

    necrodude Well-Known Member

    so basically without looks you are doomed to be single? thats gotta cheer people up.

    so what there actions is irrelevant also?
     
  20. Aurora Gory Alice

    Aurora Gory Alice Well-Known Member

    What if you're ugly and have a rubbish personality? You're basically screwed. lol