Losing a Friend

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Bambi, Jun 18, 2010.

  1. Bambi

    Bambi Well-Known Member

    really fucking hurts...I had an argument with someone that means a lot to me and now we are not speaking and it hurts like hell. He holds grudges so I don't expect him to talk to me any time in the future and I was upset for how I was being treated so spoke out and this made him upset.
    It all just sucks...our disease causes to behave in ways that are not very pretty and it is hard on the ones we care about (I am speaking for both our behaviors during this argument).
    I guess everything happens for a reason but I am sick to my stomach with sadness.
    I am so fortunate to have you guys and he cut off SF a while ago so has little support...I am terrible hurt by the way I was treated but worry about him being out there with no support and like I said the whole thing is just ripping me apart inside.

    Thanks for listening and giving me a place to just get my feelings out there in the open.

    I love you all, Bambi
     
  2. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    :hug: I hate How any human relationship is not all roses And sunshine. Just give each other time to cool off. And then ninja up behind him and :hugtackles: :)
     
  3. kyle88

    kyle88 Well-Known Member

    Just give it time to cool off... just because he holds grudges or doesn't know how to come talk to you, doesn't mean you can't go talk to him... I'm sure he feels bad about it too, but some people just don't know how to say sorry and leave things behind easily...

    But yah, just give some time for both of you to cool off, and im sure things will be ok...
     
  4. cownes

    cownes Well-Known Member

    im sorry i cant be there to try and help more, i think you understand why i cant, but ii truely am sorry :hug: :wub: things will cool down soon hun, they will, i am sure of it x x
     
  5. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry you've been hurt Bambi.....
    I'm gonna go against popular opinion here and say you're better off without him in your life if he treats you like that...
    You don't need any more stress then you already have..
    You take care of you first....:hug::hug::wub:
     
  6. itmahanh

    itmahanh Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    Hey B sorry all I have at the moment to offer is :arms: but meant with any heart i can muster x's & o's
     
  7. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Hey B, Take comfort in all those here who love you!!! We are here for you...
     
  8. Madam Mim

    Madam Mim Well-Known Member

    Hey Bambi, I just wanted to add that I am someone who holds serious grudges against people (I'm now 24 and still haven't forgiven my chemistry teacher for telling me to be quiet once - that's how bad it is), but I want you to know that it is possible to wear me down and break through the grudge, so don't give up hope.

    If this is someone you really want in your life, then let him know that. Let him know that you care about him and that you're sorry. Try to put yourself in his shoes and say what you think he needs to hear (but don't lie). I'm sure you can get through this.

    Good luck,
    Mim
     
  9. Bambi

    Bambi Well-Known Member

    Thanks for all the kind words and support everyone.

    I have offered the proverbial laurel branch so we shall see.

    While I have had many struggles I, thank you God, never had anger issues so when someone lashes out at me like he did it is not a matter of forgiveness but a strong hesitancy to not lay myself open again to have my head chopped off and my heart stomped on.

    It is so hard to tell if it is part of his disease or is he just not a very nice person that lacks self control and lets loose with venomous words of hatred/negativity. This was not the first nor the second time...it was only the first time that I stood up for myself and said don't talk to me like that...which of course served only to fuel his anger.

    I dated a guy once who had serious anger issues and while I cared for him and could see that he was in pain I had to learn to let him go and just care from a safe distance.

    Well starting to get off my own topic, thanks for letting me vent...I may start an anger issue thread as I really want to try and understand this whole issue...when I am angry I just keep quiet till I sort out what has really got me upset, which is usually something that is hurting me, and then I talk about it...."I hate you you fucking bitch. You mean nothing to me, you're nothing" is not something that comes out of my mouth let alone crosses my mind.

    Take care all and thanks again...it really helps to have a place to just air my thoughts and feelings and get great feedback and such...:arms: to all. Bambi