I don't know if I can keep fighting anymore. I have been dealing with depression for many years and have attempted suicide 4 times. But couldn't go through with it. It caused me to lose my fiance, the love of my life. She stood by me for many years but it got to be too much for her. I did so many things to her that I regret because of my depression. I feel like i cant go on anymore, I give up. I have lost the only person who ment anything to me. I have been om several medications and therapy, but nothing seems to help. I was even hospilized after my last attempt. I keep falling back down the same dark path of suicidal tendencies and wanting to give up. I just dont know what to do anymore, why cant I just be happy.