Losing my grip

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Lostfoundandlostagain

To Live... That is the adventure
#1
I feel terribly alone. Wife and i separated again 2 months ago. I cant see my kids because they are all showing corona symptoms. Talked to my three year old today son who just wants me home. Its nice to be able to call and video chat but you can't hold them through a phone. Lack of any kind of physical connection with anyone is killing me. Lately the thought keeps popping up that there is only one way to end all this pain and isolation. I really try to fight it but somewhere from a dark corner in my brain comes a voice telling me that I've broken my life so badly it can't be fixed and maybe its time to give up
 

EmB

Absolute Peach!
#2
You're doing great so far. It might not feel like it but you are. Being able to keep going through all of this, the isolation, being separated from your kids, the loneliness, the dark thoughts... that takes strength. This isolation can't go on forever. It feels almost impossible right now but you've got to work to that future when you can feel your kids in your arms again, because that'll feel better than any of this. It's worth pushing through for.

Keep connected with us, we're here for you.

Sending hugs

Em
 

Lostfoundandlostagain

To Live... That is the adventure
#3
You're doing great so far. It might not feel like it but you are. Being able to keep going through all of this, the isolation, being separated from your kids, the loneliness, the dark thoughts... that takes strength.
Hard to feel strong. I am trying to be in recovery from a 20 year addiction to pornography. It is one of the main reasons wife and I are separated. I had 2 months of sobriety but the last 4 days I've been slipping. I feel so disappointed in myself. It brings on feelings of despair and fear that i'll lose my family. I feel so mentally and emotionally exhausted
Thank you for your kind words though. They are truly appreciated
 

Butterfly

Sim Addict
Safety & Support
SF Author
SF Supporter
#4
I know it sucks but the deal with corona virus is that it is temporary and you will be able to see your children again. Keep holding on.
 

EmB

Absolute Peach!
#5
Hard to feel strong. I am trying to be in recovery from a 20 year addiction to pornography. It is one of the main reasons wife and I are separated. I had 2 months of sobriety but the last 4 days I've been slipping. I feel so disappointed in myself. It brings on feelings of despair and fear that i'll lose my family. I feel so mentally and emotionally exhausted
Thank you for your kind words though. They are truly appreciated
No one strong is ever in an easy situation. They're usually in one of the toughest and hardest situations of their lives, as are you. You don't need to feel strong to be strong, you already are being strong by staying with us and you've gotta keep that moving. And recovering from a 20 year addiction is going to have slips - just get back up again. Let that stay in the past and focus on what you do right now.

I'm sorry I don't have more than kind words, but know we are all here for you. Thinking of you - keep us in the loop.

Sending hugs

Em
 

Champagne

✯✯ Heart of an angel ✯✯
Staff Alumni
SF Supporter
#6
Hi there, sorry you are struggling and sorry to hear about your addiction.

You will be able to hug your kids son, wait it out, if you do something silly you might be able to hug them ever again.

Hold on tight, the ride will soon be over *hug
 

JDot

remember to drink plenty of water
Forum Pro
SF Supporter
#7
I can tell you're a good father who cares about his children. Your children need you. I can sense your pain missing your children. But they will need you now and as they grow older. Slipping up with any addiction sucks but it doesn't change the person you are. We're here for you.
 
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