losing touch

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by helium, Nov 2, 2010.

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  1. helium

    helium Member

    i'm new to this forum so i guess i should say hi and tell you about why i'm here...

    i'm always so stressed out. i put everything i have into my art for school. i spend every waking moment in the studio slaving away only to be told i can do better and i'm never good enough, leaving me feeling worthless. i put all of my time and effort into something that is getting me nowhere and i've stopped putting time and effort into friendships and relationships.

    the closest friendships i have are my friends in the studio. thats all it is, studio friends. i don't accept invitations to go out, i don't have dinner with them after class and i don't go to parties. i spend my time in the studio and when i'm not there i go home so i can be alone.

    recently i've realized how isolated i've become. the friends that i used to be so close with can barely even be called acquaintances at this point. the most contact i have with the majority of the people i'm actually still in contact with is through facebook. how sad and pathetic. it seems that lately i've become so disconnected that friends i've had for over 5 years don't respond to even facebook messages. i guess thats not the most personal way to reach out but its all i can muster at this point.

    it took months to realize how deep i'd gotten and that the dark thoughts i've been having aren't normal or sane. i try to pull myself out by reaching out to people but it almost feels like i'm too far gone.

    i don't know what to do. i live by myself and i used to revel in my alone time. now its all i seem to have. i've never been so lonely in my entire life. i don't even know how to relate to people anymore. this is the most i've reached out in months and i don't even know if i should expect a response.

    if you've read all of this, thank you for that.. if you have advice on how to bring myself back to people that would be great too.
  2. dartofabaris

    dartofabaris Well-Known Member

    Welcome to the forum :)
    self- induced isolation is for some, as it is for me, a coping technique..for whatever reasons you chose to gradually disconnect shall become apparent once you re-mingle with your friends. I understand it seems a much too late when we realise that we'v permanently changed the course of our social identity especially when we think that those around us too are accustomed to us behaving in this turtled manner. Its great that youv got a passion in art but dont let that become a form of overcompensation any more, it will lose the charm which once fascinated you. It was the same with facebook, although i decided to give that one up and start connecting at my own comfortable pace with those around me, im sure once people get to know more intimately, its unlikely they shall find you uninteresting. Friends becoming acquaintances and the latter becoming strangers over time is only temporary..they can be remoulded into what they once were, given time and effort. As with art, its what you make of what youv got and what youv got is more than you know...remember this when you are lost to the world, not the world to you..it seems your friends are reaching out to you not you to them, regardless of your inhibitions (what do you think they are?), dont let time legitimise them any further, make the first move..you'll always be surprised how easy it gets.
    Pm me whenever you need a chat. :hug:
  3. The Unforgiven

    The Unforgiven Well-Known Member

    :stars: hey helium!.. im kitty.
    to be honest i feel like a hypocrite giving you advice on being more social.. but fact remains that loneliness is a curse... faster rid the better.. welcome to the forum.. this place ends up being like family, just you see.. *hug
    have you tried joining some extra stuff? it need not be something crazy, just something thatll give you more exposure?.. just something thatll fill your time so that you never spend too much time alone?.. that really helps, trust me it does...
    hope i helped a little.. keep in touch!.. :)
  4. loser

    loser Well-Known Member

    You are suffering from performance pressure. Not a good way to do art.
    You are trying to hard and have lost the joy the flow of creativity. You can get it back if you stop trying.
    It seems like you cut yourself off from your friends in the studio.
    Skip parties - they can be lonely and depleting. Take a walk in parks and talk to people's dogs.
    Take regular breaks from work to take walks in fresh air.
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