I keep trying to move on, but I can't, that f****ing day I lost.....it keeps haunting me over and over. Coming to school everyday, seeing badges on other people, what could've been mine, what could have changed my life forever, the only thing I could have been proud of. The day when I conquered all my fears, stood up in front of 150+ people all alone, the majority that I knew and said my speech. Some were in tears, it was moving, funny and people I didn't know even called it "inspirational". I'm talking about the leadership position in my school, how the shitty life of mine had to make me lose by a few points. I was extremely honest up there, I didn't want any pity,I mentioned about how I was struggling with an illness and left it at that,I said I wanted to help others get where they wanted and what I thought the traits of a good leader was suppose to be, stuff like "equality" "open-mindedness" and concern for his fellow classmates (I forgave them regardless of all the shit and torment they put me through.) Inevitably I came 2nd of course, to a guy who copied his whole speech entirely off Martin Luther King and Barrack Obama. I wrote everything from the heart, I had no quotes. Why the hell did I lose? "It's your big day today"....when that was said at the day of the results that did not f***ing help, why is hope such a cruel thing. Oh yea and you know what really enraged me further? After the results....over 100 people reminding me of how I lost "Unlucky......" Argh SHUT THE F*** UP! After that, I was nominated for 2nd in position, with about three other people competing, me, a guy that went for the top position and a guy that didn't even make a speech. I was away so I couldn't write anything on the piece of paper stating why I wanted that position.....that asshole who didn't make a speech stole all my ideas about why he wanted that position, when initially he probably did it for the popularity......I had to shake both hands of those a**holes that stole what could of been mine.....that could of changed my life for the better. I'm trying to get over it, but I have to come to school every single day, to see those people with the fancy badges representing the school and on top of that I'm still a nobody, everywhere I go, strangers I don't even know come up to patronise or belittle me...... it hurts trying to move on, even though I can't, can anyone else relate to this? fuck my school and fuck leadership, it's just based on popularity.