Lost a Friend

Discussion in 'Grief and Bereavement' started by sc01706, Aug 10, 2011.

  1. sc01706

    sc01706 Active Member

    I'm really in a mess right now. I have depression, suicidal thoughts and no human friends, but today my dog died which to me was better than being with humans. The thing is, it was sudden. There was no indication. He was only 9 years old. I just woke up and he had trouble breathing and brought him to the vet. They gave him oxygen and tried to save him but he just died. They cannot explain it. His lungs just quit working. They did an autopsy and found no tumors, his heart was fine, he was a healthy weight, and his coat was in great shape. No signs if disease. He was acting perfectly normal up until this morning. The very last thing I expected to happen. I have a cat who's 17 and has been sick and likely doesn't have much time left. I know his end is coming but there was no way to prepare for the dog's death. I've been suicidal and this doesn't help. I just don't know what to do.
     
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    i know it is so hard to lose a pet hun let alone so suddenly I am so sorry for your loss hugs to you:hugtackles::hugtackles:
     
  3. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    :sad: I know only too well the pain of losing a most beloved dog, worse, you had no warning.
    You are in my thoughts :hug:
     
  4. Speedy

    Speedy Staff Alumni

    Hi sc10706,

    I am sorry to be writing you during these dire circumstances. :hug: It is impossible for me to adequately express my heartfelt sympathy. I have a two-year-old poodle, and I can't imagine what it would be like if he suddenly passed away. Long live your cat, and may your dog rest in peace.

    Warmest regards,

    Alex
     
  5. sc01706

    sc01706 Active Member

    I've been doing some research and I think someone may have given him rat poison. He had internal bleeding. The vets were working on him and blood came out of his mouth and nose and then he died. There's just no natural explanation for his death. They did blood work and didn't think he was poisoned. They are going to research it more and try to let me know what happened.
     
  6. sc01706

    sc01706 Active Member

    Oh my god upon further reading it looks like he was probably poisoned by the flea medication I gave him. I can't believe it. I killed him. This may be the final blow. I can't live anymore.
     
  7. Isabel

    Isabel Staff Alumni

    I am so, so sorry for your lost. But you cant give up, that would be a betrayal. Its always heart wrenching and there is nothing I could write that can make that go away. My old girl died last Fall and it was also very sudden. What you need to remember is that I am sure you gave him the best life possible and because of you, he had an happy, carefree life. Today, you have to deal with all the pain, but in time, all the good memories will come back and you'll see that the grief is outweighed by all those years of companionship. Most importantly, your capacity to love is still intact, and in time, you'll make another dog happy. That is the best testimony you can give to your dog, that the pain you're going through right now does not overshadow all that he gave you, all that he meant for you. You cat is counting on you to hold on. And so are many others you do not know yet. There are so many pets, each one of them with their own personality, with their own qualities that so desperately need and deserve a good home. But for now, feel what you have to feel, knowing that broken heart can be mended. One thing that helped me a lot is writing a memorial online for my girl, Lenore. So you might want to try this. Here is the link:
    http://www.dogquotations.com/write-a-memorial.html

    It helped me a lot to realize I was not alone with those almost unbearable feelings of loss. It might help you too. There is also a great book, Letters to Strongheart by John Allen Boone which helped me a lot going through loosing her. Here is a vid with a reading from the book, which may bring you some solace:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vU_1mtf42_0

    I doubt very much it was the flea meds you used. And if it was, you had only the best intentions, so dont blame yourself. We all try to do our best for those we love, and sometimes, it is just not enough or we make mistakes. This does not alter the spirit behind our intentions. You dog knew this, knew you love him, and in the end, that is all that matters. Take care.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 11, 2011
  8. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    When my cat, Kitten, died I thought it was my demise too...it was Christmas Eve that I had to put him to sleep and I miss him everyday...I am so sorry for your loss...J
     
  9. Butterfly

    Butterfly Pokémon Master Staff Alumni SF Author SF Supporter

    Hiya sc,

    It is so horrible when our pets die. They are apart of us and our family. I think reading too much into the subject is a bad thing, especially with how you are feeling anyway. You musn't blame yourself.

    Hope you feel better soon.
     
  10. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    If it was a reputable flea treatment, then I too doubt very much that that was what killed your dog.
    The way you have expressed yourself in this thread, tells me that dog had a wonderful life, a wonderful owner, was loved and knew it.
    Hope, in time, that you can offer that love to a new dog, perhaps one from a dog shelter that has known nothing but misery in its life...what a wonderful gift it would be to that dog, to get you :hug:
     
  11. jlc20m

    jlc20m Well-Known Member



    I'm so sorry for your loss. My heart goes out to you. I, too, have lost a dearly-beloved pet, so I understand what you are feeling.

    jlc20m:pinkrose: