I have been depressed in my life but nothing like the last 8 weeks i have been suicidal DAILY i have been locked in my bedroom only out to get cigarettes or food maybe 3 times. It is a struggle to get dressed or take a shower. I am about to be homeless . i miss my ex who abused me for 6 years straight STILL after 14 months of NOT EVEN SEEING HIm. he is still playing sick games w me by email and text. I want him dead i feel its HIM OR ME. i will never be able to move on i have tried to move on many times as hes abandon me million times over the years. i lost my job in july, well gave it up i guess. I had a psychotic supervisor who had been harassing me for 16 months nonstop i dont know why but i guess since iwouldnt quit she set me up and i got suspended based on HER lies, and more lies etc. i tried everytyhing to find a lawyer and NOBODY could help me i cant believe this kind of shit is legal to do to employees, so i had a nervous breakdown kinda and when i was offered my job back i couldnt go i have ptsd from my ex and now from her as well. i cant watch tv things trigger me. i cry constantly. i have old antidepressent which i took once or twice to help me sleep but i cant take that crap i refuse they alllll gave me sickening withdrawal every time i have ever taken any and they didnt help besides to make me numb and lazier then i already am and stupid. i am broke now have barely eaten in 2 months about to lose my car and be evicted. WHAT REASON IS TEHRE TO GO ON? i have nobody he was all i had here, if my 19yr old didnt live w me i would already be dead.