I just am so lost and confused in my life, I don't know where to turn. I have close familiy and friends, but I just am not one to open up really. I keep all my feelings inside, and inspite of all the good stuff, I am left with just me and my horrible feelings towards myself. I have debt, i have no car, I moved home, I'm not working now, my mind just wanders all the time. I have moments of happy times with family/friends, but in the end nothing seems to really make me happy. I have become so aware of being alone. Like I spend almost all my time alone, then put on an act when I'm around people. It's so exhausting and I just can't take it much more. I get jelous of seeing couples together cause I wish I had somebody close to do things like that with. I have gone on some dates with some guys, but it never lasts. Sigh. I have been saying to myself I'll change my life and do this and that, but I just don't, and I just can't figure myself out. It's so depressing and frustrating, my life passes me by, and people change and do this and that, and I'm left with just my miserable feelings. Anwyays, this is my first time writing in a forum, so I'm not sure what else to say. I just had nowhere else to turn. The only comforting thought I have is to look forward to not being here one day. I don't wanna die, but at the same time, I do have these feelings. I'm so confused.