Lost and Hopeless

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Angie2015, Jun 5, 2015.

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  1. Angie2015

    Angie2015 New Member

    I honestly did not want to post this i am too scared as i write this =( im a total failure nothing seems to go right ive been thinking a lot about suicide the last 2 weeks just i cant go on
    im a 30 years old transgender girl never got the money to start therapy and obviously hrt as well im tired of this pain that no one seems to understand i just cant go on most of my friends are pressuring me a lot do something -.- as if things were free i do have a job dont make enough not even for one session with the therapist -.- and to make things worse i live with my parents i feel lonely , hurt and misunderstood i talked to them some months ago finally i got the courage to talk about how i felt and as usual they ignored me.. i still remember the first time i was gonna come out to them i was 16 ,2 of my brothers ere there my older and my younger brother both of them starting speaking horrible things about transgender and gay people i got scared to death i never even considered talking about that in quite some time that being abot 7 months ago . I am tired of not living life it doesnt even matter if i am death or alive i am a burden for everyone soo im will end my life i sometimes wish things could improve but saldly they wont the only thing stopping me from killing myself is my fear of death sooo yeah i cant even kill myself which makes me feel worse...i set a goal for myself but i realized that it was dumb i have no money for it i think that this is all i have to say sorry for my terrible grammar =( goodbye.
  2. Freya

    Freya Loves SF Staff Member ADMIN

    Angie - welcome to SF. I am sorry that you are in such a difficult position, unfortunately while money doesn't make you happy, not having enough of it can make you very unhappy. I don't know anything about the transgender process so I won't pretend to - but i will say that you are not alone here. If you are able to, stop by chat. If nothing else there are people there who will talk to you, be your friend without pressuring you and not judge you.

    I am so sorry you feel so bad you want to die - hopefully someone who knows more about the transgender process will have more constructive advice than I have.

    Take care and stay safe :hug:
  3. Fall3nAngel86

    Fall3nAngel86 Member

    Setting a goal is a good thing. It means ur still lookin at life down the road. Set a goal that is reasonable for you, dont make it difficult so u cant accomplish it and become sad or depressed..There are free therapy sessions everywhere for people that need them just sit down and do alil research online. We are here to help you in what ever way we can...dont give up on life its a beautiful thing when u finally get to open your eyes and see it Trust God in every moment of life and he will guide you through life...May God bless you!
  4. Angie2015

    Angie2015 New Member

    Thank you for those who replied at the moment im scared since im loosing the will to live...i just hope i get it back im sick of this pain being alone and to make things worse the few friends i had backstabbed me and insulted me yet once again im done with this T.T
  5. Brickwall

    Brickwall Member

    Hi, Angie---I just wanted to say that I'm sorry you're suffering so much right now and I really understand how you feel . . . I hope you're OK today . . . I'm sending you good thoughts. :)
  6. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    How are you doing now Angie? :hugs:
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