Lost control

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by traintrack, Jan 8, 2007.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. traintrack

    traintrack Guest

    so yay << the selfharm is getting worser and worser. Started 5 years ago, but it was just once a month than, when I felt crappy. And so ashamed of it. So after a year my mom saw some scars and I told her I thought it was cool. What a stupid answer is that >< But I stopped with it and started smoking when I was down. So no self harm for a year or something, everything went fine. I dont really know what started making me cutting again. Maybe the bullying, going to a lower class, binging got worser, dead of 2 people in a year. But I started again, guess you all know how that goes. Start with a few, getting more, everywhere, deeper etc. Well since 2 months I started cutting other on other places. Because 2 months ago, i tried to cut my wrist. Well uhm doh, ofcourse not good enough >< so after that my legs werent good enough. So last my left arm is full too now. I have a few cuts on my right too, but they were deep and its my right arm. If I go way to deep, I might not be able to draw anymore. But the left is full and right looks so tempting. If I cant find a place on my arm, I cut now on my chest. I really lost control over this, want it to be deeper, more, everywhere. EVerything is to much lately, everything ends up, me cutting. I think no one realises how bad it is now and I'm afraid I'll need stitches the next times. But how the hell could that happen without my parents noticing it. I'm afraid everyone near me will know this year about what the fuck is going on with me and that I'll have to stop it. I cant stop it, its the only thing that calmes me down
  2. Allo..

    Allo.. Well-Known Member

    :hug: Hold on mate.. it needs to get better
  3. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    Hello you, me thinks me knows who this is and was wondering where you had got to...pm me hun very concerned with what's happening with you at the moment :bunny: (<<<<<thats to let you know me thinks its you)
  4. Lost Disciple

    Lost Disciple Well-Known Member

    Seems you're in a fair bit of a pickle. Are you in school still? If you are, a couselor's prolly the best way to go. If you don't want anyone to find out, you can not tell anyone else and slowly raise yourself to who everyone else thinks you are. On the other hand, who cares if you show how you are? Let them all know, or maybe only a few. If you don't alienate them, if you come to them for help, you'll probably find they'll be willing to listen to you and comfort you more.
    You realize that soon you'll be needing stitches for your cuts, I think you should also realize that the possibility of losing your friends is worth getting healthy for.
    Or don't. Whatever.
  5. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    am answering this again as I dont want it getting lost...pm me hun..pretty sure I know who this is and want to help
  6. Lost Disciple

    Lost Disciple Well-Known Member

    I think I'd kinda be scared if someone replied to my topic saying they thought they knew me... ...but on the other hand, if they wanted to help...

    Ask for help.
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.