Lost Hope...Everything Is A Mess

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by brknsilence, Jul 14, 2015.

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  1. brknsilence

    brknsilence Well-Known Member

    This depression has been taking everything from me. Destroying everything. My husband was gone for 3 days, comes home and we end up arguing. I'm so frustrated over this depression. I can't do anything right. I can't go anywhere. I'm a prisoner in my own home because of all this. My husband has been wanting me to get out with the kids but I can't because I'm scared I'll mess up everything. I can't do this anymore. I'm so exhausted in this fight. I'm trying my best to get through each moment. I don't even know what else to do. Is anything really going to get better? Or is that a false hope? Meds aren't working. I have therapy tomorrow which I'm finding pointless right now. I just want to cancel everything... i feel so alone..... stupid depression has taken my life.... sorry... I'll be okay tonight... just really upset..
     
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    I hear you depression ya it takes everything away it reallydoes. You talk to your doctor there are other meds to try ok tell your doctor that the medication you are on is not working there is no change so doc can add on something or change med all together. Don't give up on therapy ok i know you do not see any benefits but there will be but with depression one cannot see the changes the therapist can. It is good you are talking here letting out your frustration reaching out to others who get it. You keep fighting there is hope there is always hope just depression makes us think either wise
     
  3. AAA3330

    AAA3330 Well-Known Member

    You sound a lot like me. My illness has taken my life away and ruined everything. I'm always severely depressed, but I think that my problem is more serious than just depression. I can't do much of anything anymore. I used to do a lot of things, but now all that I do is sit in the house and feel miserable. I also feel like a prisoner within my own mind. I'm sorry that you're suffering. My doctor has me on an antidepressant called Fetzima, but I don't think that it will help. I just want my life back, but I'm pretty sure that it will never happen.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 14, 2015
  4. brknsilence

    brknsilence Well-Known Member

    There is very little antidepressants I can take right now. I'm breastfeeding so there is a lot I can't take. I see my therapist soon. I'm still very tired. Just wishing I wasn't here anymore.
     
  5. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Hi there, sorry you are feeling so down on yourself, I think your depression is clouding your judgement somewhat. Your mind is telling you that you can't do those things but you can if you get the appropriate help and support that you need. You seem like you are writing in desperation, it doesn't have to be that way. Open up here and we will help you deal with this.
     
  6. brknsilence

    brknsilence Well-Known Member

    I cancelled therapy today. I'm trying to going things done at home. Hoping things gets better. I'm feeling physically drained right now. So exhausted. Just wish I felt better
     
  7. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    May I ask why you cancelled therapy? Didn't feel like going or scared?

    Regardless I hope today is a better day for you.
     
  8. brknsilence

    brknsilence Well-Known Member

    I was too depressed to go. Plus I was really exhausted from last night.
     
  9. DrownedFishOnFire

    DrownedFishOnFire Quieta non movere

    When is your next appointment?
     
  10. brknsilence

    brknsilence Well-Known Member

    Tomorrow afternoon.
     
  11. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Don't cancel ok go this time your therapist will be able to help decrease the depression some at least mine does take time for YOU hun ok please
     
  12. DrownedFishOnFire

    DrownedFishOnFire Quieta non movere

    Hang in there. :hug:
     
  13. brknsilence

    brknsilence Well-Known Member

    Was fine this morning, now feeling blah and not feeling well. I'll go tomorrow. Just tired of this sad feeling. I feel like crying
     
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