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Lost.

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Cardiackid93, Aug 11, 2018.

  1. Cardiackid93

    Cardiackid93 New Member

    So I don't fully know where to start and I apologise if I don't make sense or if I just ramble.
    My life fell apart a numbers of years ago from a traumatic experience and it's just gone into a domino effect, I don't know where I stand in life other than being a farther to my children when I get to see them.
    If it wasn't for my children I know I wouldn't be here in life to the point I know exactly what from the note to my funeral.
    I have tried a number of times to end this pain that is my life and never able to successfully do it the closet being in critical condition in hospital.
    I just feel a robot going day by day but I just can't cope I've series professional help which made me worse was put on medication to no success my so called friends abaonded me and most my family cut their ties when I cried for help (this being before my hospital stay this year) I just don't know what to do anymore.
     
  2. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    Sorry to hear that you are going through this Cardiackid

    Sorry to hear this. Do you feel like saying more about what happened?

    I'm sorry that friends and family didn't give you the support that you needed

    There's more to treatment than just meds and therapy. The links in my signature can connect you to some more information.
     
  3. Walker

    Walker Everything Zen Staff Member Safety & Support SF Social Media SF Supporter

    Hi
    If life feels like it fell apart from an experience then you may need to be seeking therapy for that. Is that possible for you?
     
  4. Cardiackid93

    Cardiackid93 New Member

    I've tried councillors but didn't help I struggle to put my barriers down, they taught me exercises to try which work to an extent. I've been re referred to the crisis team due to my attempt
     
  5. Cardiackid93

    Cardiackid93 New Member

    To my first experience I'm not comfortable to open to it only one person knew and they used it to get to me. Since I've come to deal with deaths that I've come across with previous jobs and my current job which the last death I got diagnosed PTSD which I still don't understand why it effects me as I e dealt with more horrific deaths to this one.
    I will check the links thank you and I'm sorry for bothering if I have
     
  6. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    I guess things like this don't always make sense. It's understandable though that any death would have an impact on you, and especially if you've encountered more than one

    You're welcome!
    Not at all. This is what SF is for and why we are here
     
  7. Kevin Engle

    Kevin Engle Member

    Hello Cardiackid93: I am new to the forum and read your post and thought I would respond. I am sorry that you are having such a difficult time; it seems like you really care about your children. I have to admit that I was in so much physical pain three years ago that I wanted to end it all, too. My wife saved my life by convincing me to go to the hospital ED. I know that things seem bad right now, but please don’t make a permanent decision based on a temporary situation. I will keep you in my thoughts. Would you mind if I prayed for you?