Love as a second word for Pain

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Summer.Rain, Aug 20, 2008.

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  1. Summer.Rain

    Summer.Rain Well-Known Member

    3 years since i saw her, 3 years i love her
    i cant look at any other girl becouse of that
    yet she dosnt even know my name, and even if she knew it
    our lives are too diffrent and we will never be together.

    3 years of pain.

    people say love is the most powerful feeling
    but what if love turns in-to pain?
    every time i look at her, i feel like 1000 knives pirce my heart
    it is so painful that when i feel it, its like im in hell, and then i turn my head
    and close my eyes and the pain is over.

    Why? Why do i love her? i know we will never be together
    i know how much pain i feel every time i look at her
    yet i accept this pain becouse i want to look at her, forever!
    Shes so perfect, i could just freez this moment for like million years
    just standing there and looking on her perfect eyes, drowning in my feelings
    i cant breath, i feel like tears fill my eyes, i feel so much pain i cant think.

    She is the last thing i want to see before i die
    she is the light in my life
    she is my blasing and my curse

    I have a plan
    I will take her photo with me
    She will be there with me on my last step
     
  2. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Hello Summer.Rain,
    Why don't you talk to her. You never know she just might fool you and talk and smile at you.
    I had a girl I knew who told me that pretty girls can be lonely because of there looks. They say no one approaches them because they are pretty. So they also live an isolated life. What do you have to loose?
    Please don't harm yourself!! You say she doesn't know you exist, well what do you think she will do when you commit? Trust me you are young, and you have a full life ahead of you. Say this love goes nowhere, well you will find a girl who will love you back. Take Care and Stay Safe!!!
     
  3. Summer.Rain

    Summer.Rain Well-Known Member

    Thank you
    but unfortunatly things are much more complicated then what it looks like.
    1. Shes marryed
    2. Shes from a diffrent country

    The problem is that i dont really know her, i love her basicly becouse of
    the way she looks, i know it sound stupid but im in love with a celebrity.
    I know many people fall in love with such people, but for me its something
    more then just "shes sexy so i love her"... I first saw her 3 years ago..
    since then i couldnt love another girl, that it why i feel so lonley.
    There is something scpacial about her, when i look at her its like im in heaven, i forget everything
    and im just hipnotized by her, i can look at her photos for hours
    but the more i look at her the more painful it become.
    I think shes the most perfect girl in the whole univarse
    it was like that 3 years ago and i still think that way.
    I can find many girls to date with, but i cant love them, i tryed to forget
    about her by finding another girl, and it didnt works, my love is too strong.
     
  4. touglytobeloved

    touglytobeloved Well-Known Member

    then love becomes the biggest pain ever known
     
  5. Summer.Rain

    Summer.Rain Well-Known Member

    Thats right my freand :(

    All that is left of my heart is a bit of burned ashes
     
  6. Nyu

    Nyu Well-Known Member

    Yh, love IS painful....:cry:

    I'm sorry you have to go through this, I know how hard it can be. I'm pretty sure that if i can't have him, I'll just have to kill myself. I can't live this way forever... I just love him too much.
     
  7. DrowningInTears

    DrowningInTears Well-Known Member

    i cant love anybody no love has ever been given to me. i am unloveable, and so cant love the cruel monsters that ignore me
     
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