So I've decided that there is no way I will be able to live a life with someone who can reciprocate the feelings I have for them. After looking on as the girls I love are either not what I thought they would be, or someone getting there before me, I've given up. I'm 17, and love hurts. A lot. Admittedly, most of my "crushes" started by noticing how pretty they looked and how they seemed like nice people to me at the time. But they have either changed, or ended up being no better than those popular girls who are just looking to fuck. I dont want a fuckbuddy, nor do I want some charity bullshit, I Need a real relationship. And the only time I had the chance and actually seized it, someone ended up getting there before me. Happiness, love and and faith are gifts, and I have not received any of them. I'm tired of the heartbreak, the loneliness, and the misery. I give up, I dont care anymore. Now please excuse me while i go cry myself to sleep. again.