This is to the people that have been there the past few days while I have been "struggling" Terry aka Smelly. You are the one person from day one that I haven't fought with. You are the only one that actually got along with me and "got" me even if the bitchy side flaired out, you went right along with it. I love you for your spunk, for your flair, for your personality, for your honesty and sincerity. You have always been honest with me and have always been there for me. Even in your darkest moments you still took time for others. You let other people drain you dry and you never ask for help. We are alot alike and that's why I think we get along so much. In reality, you are the best friend I have here and I will always be there for you, no matter what. :hug: Nutter aka Matt. Still will always see you as MJ. Sorry. Thank you for always kicking my ass on MSN and telling me to quit with the pills and the booze. I know what I need to do but like you it's a tough battle upwards. You are a sweetheart and I hope you see that someday. If not I'll have to walk water to get to Aus. and kick it into your head. It may hurt your pretty lil face but hey...it could work. Thank you for staying by me even when I called you out on a lot of shit and basically verbally kicked your ass. You have always been in my thoughts, even if you disappear and think you don't deserve help. You do and always know you can come find me and we can complain together. :hug: Jessus aka Sus. :biggrin: love you little sis, that's basically what you have been through all of this. At the beginning we fought lil enemies now we fight the evil together. I'm sorry for what you are dealing with at home, it's an unfair situation. You don't deserve to be treated the way you are. You are a dime a dozen sweetheart and you deserve the world. Thank you for helping me today. Believe it or not..even with just the simplest words you have helped. Don't think that the things you say are meaningless because they are not. Stay strong and keep fighting the fight and please don't let the little people in the world knock you down. you deserve to be upright and smiling beautifully. :hug: The Discarded aka Ear. You my dear have always been there for me, even if we haven't talked as much as we used to. We are alot alike with the situations we are in. I look at you and I see so much of me there, with taking care of your sis. I know when she is older and she looks back on it all, she will say "Rae, thank you for being there for me. You are my rock and I love you for everything" I hear it in her voice how much she loves you and I see how much you love her. You are an exceptional young woman and I hope you excel at all of your dreams and aspirations. Stay strong and don't let anyone take away your happiness. :hug: Ester my lil dutch firecracker. I know we have had a tough go between us. We have had some massive fights but even with those fights we still talk to day and we still both care about each other. I'm sorry for the shit you have been dealt with, including with SF. The ongoing drama never ceases to amaze me. I have been sucked into it many a time. I hope in your life Est. you find true love and true happiness. The "L" word does not come easy to either of us, but I do hope you find it. I hope that you grow up and realize what a beautiful and strong minded person you are. Don't let people here or anywhere take away what you deserve, a life of happiness. :hug: Xilon(don't know if i can use your name here so I won't). Thank you for talking to me these past couple nights. It means alot to me that you barely know me and you have taken the time to help me through so much. Do not let people in your life control you, get out while you can. It will be hard the first couple months, but once you get past that you can do as you want and live your life. Do not let those so called friends beat you down because from what i can see you are a wonderful person and don't deserve it. Again thank you. :hug: SevenStorySelf. Thank you for the past couple nights in talking to me, especially last night. You are a very talented person and a very sweet person. When you find that person who will love you for you don't ever let go, because that is what you deserve. Stay sweet, stay kind, stay thoughtful, stay you. Don't change for anyone you are perfect the way you are :hug: JohnADreams. though we haven't talked alot lately. Thank you for our chats in the past. I hope that you get through whatever is in your mind and heart. You are a wonderful person, a sweetheart, and deserve to live in this world as happy as possible. Don't change for anyone, ever. Stay the sweet tasty hotdog you are...lol :hug: Insignificant, Snowman, Gentlelady, Danni- Thank you for your time in chat in listening to me. even if it was for five seconds I appreciate it. I appreciate the offers to talk and help. I find it hard to let out whats inside. Someday I hope to but as for now thank you for the offers and it goes both ways please know that. If I missed anyone. I'm sorry...i know..i suck :wink: On a side note. To those that have knocked me down, I thank you because in the end it will only build me up stronger and better than ever. So please knock me down and take me out..because at the end of the day I know who I am.