:mortdesinos: This was something I was going to send someone but didn't: I don't think you should have approached me XD . You were literally in my dreams and nightmares the whole night, as well as in all my waking thoughts. Please stay away, I don't want to hurt you. It's not really you, or me, it's more my spirituality, we are all like candles, but some of us are bonfires, and those people everything in me seems to want to lunge toward and bowl over like a giant alsation dog coz I'm very attuned, but I've never seen one so bright. I don't know what to do, it's killing me inside. Please stay away. Please forgive me. I don't know what to do. I don't even know anything about you. I'm so sorry. I'm not like you, I'm not like anyone. I'm scared of you too, I'm scared of everyone. I don't know what to do, I wrote a song even. I don't know their age, I know they're female, I hope they are not too young, if they are 63, well it's okay by me, though...I don't know what to do. I don't care what they look like, coz I imagine what they'll look like some day beyond all this, I'm the only one who does that, I don't care, I swear. Help me someone. Help me God. I don't want to hurt them. Maybe I'm insane, am I insane? ._. What's wrong with me, I wish I could tell them I'm sorry, I wish I could say sorry to those in my past who I've hurt, maybe I'm insane. I’ve got to control myself, I’ve ****ed up enough people’s lives already online, God give me the strength to keep this to myself. God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. I’m too horrible anyway, if they could see the disgusting, ugly person I really am, they’d pity me. What can I offer in this life to someone so sophisticated? Nothing, I'm just a pathetic hermit with no future, past or present. I mean sure one day I'll be dancing in the stars and I'll be able to give whole realms to anyone and paint her name in the sky with real stars and fireworks never seen on Earth when I ask her to...well I won't say it, but until then, I can't do anything, I'm too much of a mess, I break hearts, I have demon's hands. Anyway, it's all dreams, just bull****, it's just dreams, pining dreams of garbage in the real world. I feel sick. I feel so scared and sick. Is it wrong? ._. I'm going to cry, I don't know what to do ;__; . Why is my life like this? Why are all the rainbows black? ;__; I'm too cursed, I'm too unlucky, nothing is meant to be in my life, it always slips out of my hands. I want you guys to watch the next video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-CLEg5RarAg Bosson – Over the mountains Like in the video, I also had a red light in my room, whilst I was in bed, it was on my 21st. Grrrrr! Get out of my ****ing head! Here’s my video, it's got terrible clicks and everything XD I really screwed up: http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=100272807 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cdwbMaxJoNA C Am Roses and raindrops F G Violets and dew C Am F G My love and wishes for you C Am Paint me a star Dm G Give me your dreams C Am Dm G C Shower the rainbows with tears E Am There is a light Dm G That shines from your face C Am Translucent and pure F G It's never afraid C Am And whilst on it's seas Dm G I'm drowning so lost C Am Dm G C I know it will guide me back home to you [Whistle] Gm [5th fret bar chords] Blood on the snow [5th fret bar chords] Ash in the wind Gm [5th fret bar chords] Pain in the red [5th fret bar chords] But it will end C Am Roses are red F G Violets are blue C Am F G C Though I swear there's none like you dear Anyway, I'm just venting...just ignore me ^__^ . I'll be okay, somehow.