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making suicidal look accidental to ease the pain of loved ones

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by E69, May 1, 2010.

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  1. E69

    E69 Member

    i have been thinking that there are many forms of suicide that will cause less pain to loved ones.

    i dont understand how people can XXXX. i cannot imagine finding someone i care about in a bathtub with XXXX.

    on the other hand, if i die in what seemed like an accident, at least it would not be as tramautic for the people i know.

    i will try to leave this world without hurting anyone else, and causing the least amount of pain to the people i know.

    an accidental suicide at least protects the pysche of the people who are here, after i am gone.
    Last edited by a moderator: May 1, 2010
  2. Leiaha

    Leiaha Well-Known Member

    Hmmm I had this same idea and mentioned it to my psychologist. She basically told me that because I had a history of Depression/suicide attempts that the coroner would probably put it down to suicide anyway. Needless to say, I gave up on this idea!

    Lea x
  3. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

  4. Ziggy

    Ziggy Antiquitie's Friend

    There are 2 people I know, one died a horrible death, one died in an 'accident'. It was the person who died in the accident that caused the most pain to people, and that doesn't surprise me.
  5. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    I agree....your friends and family will probably know what really happened...
    don't do it...get help first....
  6. E69

    E69 Member

    No they won't know.
  7. carekitty

    carekitty Guest

    Even if for some reason they didn't find out it was suicide, they would still feel pain. I know if someone I loved died in an accident, I would still be devastated.

    You won't be sparing them pain by making it look accidental. The best way to spare them pain is to get whatever help you need to want to stay with them.
  8. E69

    E69 Member

    It's not that easy. I have already seen half a dozen doctors. Tried every treatment available. I have more doctors appointments but I know they will lead to nothing. Round and round the merry go round.

    I think an adult should be able to decide if they want to end their life.
  9. Things

    Things Well-Known Member

    Quoted for truth.
  10. carekitty

    carekitty Guest

    Ultimately, the choice will be yours.

    I don't know what you have been through, but I know that whether accidental or not, your loved ones will be in pain. And the only way to spare that pain, is for you to continue to be with them.

    If you still have some doctor's appointment left, why not at least wait until you've seen them. Maybe they will lead to nothing, but maybe they may be able to help. Why not give it a try?
  11. E69

    E69 Member

    I have counted the days to each doctor's appointment. I do tests, and more tests. I have tried "out of the box" treatments. I am responding to nothing. I am in physical pain where I cannot function as a human being.

    Although my family will be sad, the stress they are under now, from my illness is great. I feel they will find some relief when I am gone. Sadness, but relief.
  12. carekitty

    carekitty Guest

    I don't want to pry into what your illness is, but if you would like to talk about it, please pm me.

    I have a disorder known as ALPS. I am also in constant pain, ranging from moderate to severe. I spent Friday night at the ER. I feel so guilty, as I can't function very much, and that time in the ER is going to clean us out financially. I feel guilty, and have also often thought that my family would be better off without me.

    I finally broke down and told my husband how I felt. He couldn't believe that I felt that way, as I'd hidden it from everyone. But he told me that there was no amount of money or inconvenience that I could cause that would make it easier on him and my son if I died. And I believe he was sincere. And I believe my son would feel the same way.

    Put yourself in your family's shoes. If one of them was in your position, how would you feel if they died? Would you want them to keep trying, or do you feel it would be easier on you if they were gone?

    I am not trying to make light of this decision, or say that I understand your circumstances. But maybe it's worth trying a few more doctor's or treatments. My health issue went undiagnosed for almost 40 years, before a woman I talked to happened to recognize the symptoms, and referred me to the NIH. It turns out the problem is genetic, and my son has it as well. If nothing else, I figure my going through it may make it easier for my son.

    Again, please let me know if there is anything I can do.
  13. E69

    E69 Member

    I sent you a message but I do not think there is anything you can do.

    I do thank you for your kindness and compassion.
  14. carekitty

    carekitty Guest

    Of course you're welcome.

    I answered your message, and hopefully it will go through. I still have trouble at times with sending stuff. The computer and I don't always agree...... :wink:
  15. myrobotfriend

    myrobotfriend Member

    Believe me, having a loved one die by accident is just as painful as having them die on purpose.
    You feel guilty about leaving those you love, and the pain it will cause. I don't think that you are as worried about causing them the least amount of pain. Maybe it's not a conscious thought, but maybe subconsciously you are worried that if it looks like a suicide they will blame their pain on you, that they will remember you as being "selfish". You are afraid of losing their love, even in your death.

    I'm not calling you a bad person or anything. You're not. Just.. look at what you're trying to achieve. If there is so much love in your life that you are afraid of losing, EVEN IN DEATH, maybe it's a sign that somewhere in your brain you have hope.
  16. E69

    E69 Member

    It's true. Even when I am dead, I dont want people to think poorly of me. I don't want them to think "he was a coward who committed suicide" which is the knee jerk reaction/judgement that people think when they think about suicide.

    People say suicide is selfish, but everyones circumstances are different.
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