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masked misery

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Well-Known Member
Back in the dark place again. Started takin seroxat again it kind of helped for 2week, then I came crashing hard.

I was alone a week he was away so called shit of a dad. I loved it was relaxed house was clean n tidy etc he's a dirty slobby pig hate isn't a big enuf word.

Stopped meds had a minor blip with alcohol, bulimias same old. OCD is severe.

Everydays the same, cleanin after tht pig the dogs and myself. The meds merely masked the misery. Pathetic.

I wish I could escape if not forever. I'm so tired but its neverending he does nothing n nothing right. Useless can't even wash a pot cos he's tight n darent run hot water so just dips the pots in dirty water n puts them away with muck n food still on. VILE

Hate it hate him hate my mother hate my whole family. HATE.

I don't know, if only I had something. Sometimes I miss past friendships & my only relationship. But even wen I was ill they never helped. At my lowest of lows I find it more distressing the fact tht I have no one to turn to. No one to listen, no consolation no comfort no nothing.

Pains me.

total eclipse

SF Friend
Staff Alumni
sorry you feel so alone in your pain. I hope you continue to post reach out here. You are heard here okay and we care i care. Just know in time you will be able to move out of that place move into a place of your own where you will have peace. I hope you get back on your meds okay stay stable so you can keep you well enough so when that day comes you will be strong enough to make a new home for you.
i know how it is to live in turmoil but when your an adult you run your life okay noone else hugs
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