"Men don't get raped."

Discussion in 'Rape and Abuse' started by Gergin, Sep 12, 2014.

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  1. Gergin

    Gergin Well-Known Member

    I didn't know a lot about the army before I joined but, one thing I heard over and over again was that the drill sergeants were suppose to make your life at basic training a living hell. Being the only Hapa, I was targeted a lot. So I thought it was just normal the way I was being treated. I was what they called "the platoons lesson" any disciplinary action that happened was put on me so everyone would be kept in line. Unless they wanted the same punishment put on them. Eventually, a lot of the soldiers started to dislike me and treating me badly while the others just avoided me entirely. Then the soldiers who didn't like me started hiding my linens so I had nothing to sleep with at night, or they would always put on the worst details and they always messed up my locker during inspection so I would get in trouble. One day I was put on supply detail with a soldier I considered a friend, the supplies were in a warehouse separate from the bay, but when we got to the warehouse to get things ready for the platoon, The guy I was put on detail with hit me on the back of my head with the butstock of his m-16, Then him and two others held me down and had tape wrapped around my eyes and hands, then I was dragged to the back of the warehouse where they took turns sexually assaulting me. After they left me I just lied there for a while to recuperate. I started screaming and crying, I seriously thought I was going to die that night. I didn't tell anyone anything cause I felt ashamed. It wasn't until I got out of basic that I've said anything or tried to get help. I couldn't take the therapy the army was giving. It became an issue where every time I came back, it was a different person, a different person I had to tell my horrible story too. As a human being, I can't function the way I used too. I just feel damaged.
  2. NYJmpMaster

    NYJmpMaster Have a question? Message Me Staff Member Forum Owner ADMIN

    I am sorry this happened to you. I hope you are getting some type of therapy and help now, as it is far too difficult a thing for anybody to deal with on their own without professional help. Their is professional help that can make this easier to deal with so you can regain some sense of normalcy in your life.
  3. meaningless-vessel

    meaningless-vessel Well-Known Member

    I don't believe the title of the thread for one minute.

    While being raped is a highly sensitive topic for women who are on the receiving end of such diabolical behaviours, and they struggle to get it out and talked about, for a man? There's more embarrassment, even lower likelihood of being believed, as well as other stigmas that are attached.

    I'm sorry its caused you discomfort, but I'd recommend steering towards professional help of some calibre because I'm fairly confident that it will continue to eat away at you regardless, and it would just be made a trifle easier with a therapist well away from the army in any format.
  4. snogo

    snogo Well-Known Member

    Feelings such as guilt, shame, anger, can indeed be overwhelming for anyone in your situation. I would not have known what to do, who to trust anymore. I would only pray this is the 1st and last time I'm gonna be subjected to this.

    I hope you are already ready to seek professional help as soon as possible. Continue to pour out here. Take care.
  5. Powerpuff

    Powerpuff Active Member

    First, don't feel ashamed, you did nothing wrong, you are the victim. I can't give any better advise than has been given but to get help, if you're still in the army then maybe help from outside of the army. I didn't get help and it does damage one,, getting help is most important.
  6. Twocky61

    Twocky61 Banned Member

    As has already been said Gergin you need to seek professional help, preferably in civvy street, as often the armed forces close (as with some organisations generally) ranks so they are not tarnished by what they would term as scandal.

    tc Gergin

  7. Hi gergin,

    First of all, so sorry for what you have been through. Not only the rape but also being targated like that. It was also very insensitive that you had to keep seeing different therapists, how can you build confidence and trust and make progress with out consistancy. Its not fair what you have been through and i really hope you can get the support you need.
    I am female but ive always known that men do get raped. Ive been sexually abused as a child and my brother as a child was raped by a man and of course that had a really bad affect on him. He became an out of control child didnt get the help he needed and became a violent adult spending alot of time in prison. He is due to get released soon and has had alot of therapy. He finally seems at peace and is calm now.
    I was raped as an adult too. I personally believe that alot of men get raped but men find it difficult to open up and talk about these things. There should be more awarness about male rape and support groups, help lines etc.
    I wish the best for you. Hope the animals who did this too you rot in hell.

    Keep your head up high,
    Hope things get better for you
    Take care

    From sophie
  8. Viktor

    Viktor Well-Known Member

    Bullying or even such abusing is one of things that disgusts me most. People that does that to anyone needs to be taught lesson hard way. If i saw how they are doing that to you, i would switch to total aggressive mod and started to see red and i would hurt them. No matter if i was physically up for it or not. Yes, i was bullied too. Not sexually abused like you, which is even worse, but i was bullied. And i know how much hell on earth it can be for a man. As it was mentioned here, do not feel ashamed. They are not worth it. They should feel ashamed and they deserve "their brains to be beaten out of their heads". Sorry for using a bit too drastic words, but i always get really mad when i hear/read someone was bullied or abused. Remember, you are better than them. Smarter and better in EVERY way! And they are zeroes! Pieces of sh*ts!
  9. W Miller

    W Miller Well-Known Member

    Make sure you get this professional help. I know I'm late to reply to this, and hopefully you're taking the proper steps to begin your recovery. Please don't allow this to turn you sour, and make you fell totally damaged. Please, you can overcome this, and become stronger. I was abused myself, and I at times feel damaged myself. I am still trying to come to terms with my abuse, and how it has changed me.

    I was bullied my entire life for being myself, and I'm not changing to blend in. But enough about me.

    I really hope you will come back here and allow us to support you through your darkest moments. You will have a tough time when the anniversary date comes along (trust me).

    We will be here for you Gergin.

    It cant rain every day :)
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