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Mental Health Support Failing

skeletonguts

skeletonguts

New Member
#1
#1
My mental health downgraded completely when I was 11/12 but I received help whenever I was 13 after my scars were discovered. This help was absolute shit, I went to therapy just for them to tell me everything I was saying was wrong, doubting me and telling me to just not hurt myself. You could tell a therapist you have fingers and they would still find a way to tell you that you don't. Plus at this time I was also restricting food, what did my therapist tell me? "I could get you on the scales! You are skinny!" Then it brings me chocolate days later.. like I don't want this bullshit I want support and coping mechanisms not you saying nothing is wrong with me. Time skip a few years later, school sends me home and I have to speak to a crisis team as they were very worried I was going to kill myself. The crisis team spoke to me for a few weeks but were absolute shit. Blamed things on my hormones, my Gp gave me birth control which did nothing to help. I was also put in hospital due to my eating disorder, I starved myself and developed a fear of liquids because I felt it was making me gain weight. My crisis worker told my family that he doesn't think I have any eating disorder at all. Which has really pissed me off because I know from YEARS of struggling with one that I have an eating disorder. At the moment I am incredibly suicidal and just emotionless really, I have no support. I can't bring myself to go to school, I have no motivation to do anything, I have not left my house in ages and I left everyone I love because I feel like everyone is a distraction from me taking my life and also from my eating disorder. I have the smallest amount of hope left and it gets smaller everyday because anytime I speak to a therapist I right away get invalidated and made to feel like nothing is wrong with me; I have a history of suicide attempts which gets ignored by them. I am just always miserable or overall feel nothing. Fuck, I would even take antidepressants. Not a fan of meds but ANYTHING to help me, unfortunately they won't do anything to help because all my years of suicide attempts, anorexia, self harm, childhood trauma (abuse, nelgect ect.) and self destruction of everything I love is nothing but a mere low mood, not depression. There is nothing wrong with me. Which I sometimes believe but at the moment I think that is a ridiculous concept. Maybe there is nothing wrong with me now but once I take my own life they probably won't be saying that.
 
may71

may71

mr. may
#3
#3
Sorry that you've gone through and are going through so much @skeletonguts
I'm sorry that your therapist and others have been so invalidating. The system has really failed you.

There may be a way to get around the obstacles that the system is putting up. There may also be some treatment methods you could try that don't involve engagement with the system. I'd be happy to try to help with that if you'd like, but it's also ok if you don't want that.

I hope something can help.
 
ib4uib

ib4uib

Well-Known Member
#4
#4
I've watched two people today stuff there faces with food. The excuse was if they don't eat they'll get cranky. It made no sense to me whatsoever.
Food is boring, it comes mostly wrapped up in plastic or in a tin, has a list of crap that it contains and tells you to eat it within a certain timeframe or it's gone off.
Himalayan salt that has been in the rock for millions of years has a use by date of approximately one year if you should ever buy any at the shop, I guess they must of dug it up just in time.

You will probably find you'll never get the answers you want from family or therapists, they'll tell you the obvious like you're already experiencing.
Though it's hard to find focus I would send them all a massive 'up yours' by getting a couple of flower pots, filling them with compost and setting a few seeds of your own.
Everything fruit/vegetable based is easy to grow and you can show them all that you're quite capable of creating your own food without having to eat crap like chocolate
It will add a bit of a distraction for yourself and you can watch the very seeds you grow turn into healthy food!

That's what I do anyways!

 
I

iloverachel

An outcast, forgotten and excluded by society
#7
#7
*hug
Sorry you are in so much pain
It is very heartbreaking to see someone suffer so much
I hope you find the help you need to heal from these suicidal thoughts and suffering
 
seabird

seabird

meandering home 🦢☔️
SF Supporter
#11
#11
ib4uib said:
I've watched two people today stuff there faces with food. The excuse was if they don't eat they'll get cranky. It made no sense to me whatsoever.
Food is boring, it comes mostly wrapped up in plastic or in a tin, has a list of crap that it contains and tells you to eat it within a certain timeframe or it's gone off.
Himalayan salt that has been in the rock for millions of years has a use by date of approximately one year if you should ever buy any at the shop, I guess they must of dug it up just in time.

You will probably find you'll never get the answers you want from family or therapists, they'll tell you the obvious like you're already experiencing.
Though it's hard to find focus I would send them all a massive 'up yours' by getting a couple of flower pots, filling them with compost and setting a few seeds of your own.
Everything fruit/vegetable based is easy to grow and you can show them all that you're quite capable of creating your own food without having to eat crap like chocolate
It will add a bit of a distraction for yourself and you can watch the very seeds you grow turn into healthy food!

That's what I do anyways!
]
Click to expand...
I think it depends on the quality of what goes our faces. I try to get as much veggie and fresh protein food as I can. The occasional treat is fine. In my experience, that is.

It is nice you mention the re-growing of bits of vegetable. I have beets, leek, carrots, potato, & garlic sprouting on a sunny shelf. All except their rops were used in meals. Now they're providing a cheery spot and bits of greens for more meals.

*hug
 
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