I'm an army reservist, with a deployment date coming in 2011. I'm not going one way or another, but thats not the point. I hate it but its true, i suffer from depression, anxiety, panic attacks, OCD, insomnia, and borderline paranoid schitzophrenia. I say borderline because its like this. You know how you talk to yourself in you head in your internal monologue? Well its my voice but its not me talking. And they say horrible things which I have to admonish and declare not true to myself. They also flash mental pictures at me of terrible things I would never do. I do take my medication, (which the army doesn't know about), but the only thing thats truly helps, without all the debilitating side effects, is medical marijuana. I have been a mmj patient for about 5 years and have no complaints about the therapy. It doesn't leave me sleepy or braindead like other anti anxiety or anti psychotics, plus there's no rebound effect. The problem is that I constantly have it hanging over my head the possability of random drug testing. And since the army is still living in the 1930's, they don't acknowledge the medical benefits of cannabis. I risk losing my health insurance, gi bill, monthly check, and being blacklisted from ever working again, plus having my bank account cleaned out when they take back their bonus. So my choice is to not take the medication that works, and live in extreme pain, or risk having my future taken from me by the millitary. I don't see any way out. I hate the army for doing this to me.