Miserable failure

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by Fitzy, Jan 4, 2011.

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  1. Fitzy

    Fitzy Well-Known Member

    I have hardly gone out for more than two weeks. Officially it was because I had a chest infection but the reality is that I just to hide away.
    I am sleeping so much, or sometimes not sleeping all night and then sleeping most of the day.
    I cant be bothered bathing or getting dressed.
    Because I didn't sleep on sunday night but slept of Monday so I took some sleeping tablets on Monday night so I could sleep ready for work on Tuesday. Except I slept until 3.30 pm today and failed to get to work. I'm so scared about the consequences and so scared that I won't make it tomorrow. I just want to stay here in this numb state.
    I feel so bleak and scared and I don't know what to do.
    I was cutting (superficially) last night before I went to sleep. The pain tells me I am alive but I don't want to be. I just want life to go away.
     
  2. cathyr

    cathyr Member & Antiquities Friend

    Sorry you are feeling so bad Fitsy.:console:

    I just recently went through a period like this. I tend to oversleep to escape. It takes a lot for me to get up and dressed but I usually feel better if I do. Gettin in the shower is a *major* production. I never really want to go out either, other than the usual stuff I need to do....work, grocery shopping, errands. I find that when my sleep is screwed up the depression is worse. The only good thing is that I only work part time and I don't have to go in early.

    Anyway, didn't mean to highjack your post but I DO understand what you are going through. Maybe it would help if you could just get out for like 20 minutes a day? Do you have a dog you can take for a walk? I find that taking baby steps is the best way to do it.
     
  3. Fitzy

    Fitzy Well-Known Member

    I wish I had s dog but that's not possible right now.
    I have to go to work tomorrow - just have to see what happens!?!?
    Thanks for responding.
     
  4. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    :hug:
     
  5. CatherineC

    CatherineC Staff Alumni

    I slept until 2 and missed work! It's the holiday season, the sleep pattern goes right out of the window. I got a text message from one of my managers at 3 asking if I was okay. It amused me highly since they're supposed to check up on you by 10 in the morning. Then I got another text from my overall boss asking me if I was okay...
    Managed to get up today though and hopefully so have you.
    I don't know who you work for Fitzy but in the UK, you're covered by the Disability Discrimination Act for this. If you pm who your employer is to me, I'll tell you how best to handle it. I work a lot with employment law, particularly in the Equalities field.
    You can't get away with it every day of course but once a year should be manageable. Also you're entitled to lots of reasonable adjustments in the work place but they depend on the size of the company who employs you.
    Sorry to hear that you're still really down but this is one area where you shouldn't have too many worries. Pm me!
    Stay strong
    x
     
  6. nanashikun

    nanashikun Member

    Urghhh, I know just what you mean! I sleep a lot so I can avoid being awake and miserable. I've been missing all my classes this past week... but today I finally managed to get up early! I think I'm so oversaturated on sleep that I physically can't sleep anymore, lol. It's small but still a step towards improvement, right? Hopefully working on the little things will help us feel better :console:
     
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