Hi.. I'm 38 years old and am currently suffering from severe depression, anxiety and suicidal thoughts. Part of me would like to commit suicide because I view it as an escape from my problems but in all reality I am too afraid to kill myself. The thoughts persist though. I am broke, nearly homeless, and watching my two beautiful parents fall apart physically and mentally. It is very upsetting for me to see them like this. I know times are difficult for everyone right now but times have been hard for me my whole life. Sorry if it sounds like I'm complaining but I found this forum and I just feel like letting of some steam. How do you cope with intense feeling of despair, worthlessness and a desire to take your own life?? I really just want to be happy and help my family members. If I committed suicide I know it would shatter them.