Mixed emotions

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by inhibit, Apr 16, 2013.

  1. inhibit

    inhibit Member

    My mom, who is utterly clueless to the collection of mental disorders I most likely have, is triggering me to no end.

    She's always been triggering to me, I just feel so terrible about it. She keeps making indirect comments about suicide, and I just find it so damn offensive! If my brother and her get to say it, why do I have to keep it all in? Why can't I get help? Why am I not worth sticking around for?

    It makes me so angry, depressed, and boderline-suicidal that they can do that and I cannot. I know this is a horrible attitude to approach this from, but I never said I was a great person. It's just that I've been reserving this for four years and haven't said a word for their convenience. My brother gets help, and I am denied it.

    Sorry for my ranting, just... Blerg.
  2. Kiba

    Kiba Well-Known Member

    Is there a way u can say things? Or are you out of ur own not wanting to? I mean I guess I'm asking, do they force you basically to stay quiet or do you stay quiet because its easier or too hard to talk about? etc? I guess for me I am kinda the person outside the family circle. Dispite my other siblings also having mental problems.. Its complicated but I can understand the not being treated the same even tho u and ur sibling may be very similar or both deal with mental issues.
  3. Theodora

    Theodora Well-Known Member

    Inhibit, what help have you tried to get?
  4. inhibit

    inhibit Member

    Youkai-- Yes, I could speak about these emotions, but I have to be the normal one for my mom's social life with other family. She's told me multiple times that I cannot really mess up and what not.

    Theodora-- I've tried to explain to my mom that I think I have something wrong with me, she just discards it as a medicine issue and sends me to the family doctor. That jumbles my life around far too often. I've tried. I really have.

    Thank you both for reading and listening. It's nice to know there are people out there.
  5. Theodora

    Theodora Well-Known Member

    Inhibit, I asked you what help you had tried to get for yourself. Not how your mother didn't understand. I heard and understood that fact. Your medical doctor can be a portal to other help if you choose to take charge of your own life. Sorry that will sound like a tough message.
  6. inhibit

    inhibit Member

    It's alright. I have this side of me as well, and I know it is rather pointless to complain about something that won't change. Thank you.
  7. Theodora

    Theodora Well-Known Member

    Say a waste of valuable time and energy rather than pointless. It may be distracting you from the frightening thought of change.