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mmm, yep

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Tree1055

Member
#1
#1
Yeah, i'm new, and i really dunno where to start. i've attempted once, and it didnt go well at all. i just got angry at everything that ever kicked me when i was down. i slumped again, now i'm getting less angry at what causes it each time, just thinking of methods. my first attempt wasn't me stopping myself, it was situational problems after situational problems, i am prolly just saying that though.

my normal copes arn't going so well anymore. its not helping my state by posting here, and sharing feelings and asking for help are two things i'm horrible at.

the only thing that really keeps me going is the thought of telling everyone who said i couldn't get past their expectations of me some pretty nasty things, but its getting hard. iuno what else to say
 
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Sadeyes

Staff Alumni
#2
#2
Hi Tree and welcome...you were very brave to post and I am so glad you did start to share how you were feeling...also, glad you decided to be here to show others (and hopefully yourself) what you can accomplish...please continue to tell us how you are doing...all the best, J
 
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Tree1055

Member
#10
#10
i was looking over these new people's messages, and mine seemed to not really say anything about who i am.

i'm 19 yo, and very athletic. too proud too i guess. i was the uppity guy on the sports team and art-classes in highschool. i only really had one dream, and i've acted toward it basically all through school. it bet it seems small to some people, but not being able to become a police officer for me was driving a train rail spike in the back of my head. i can't qualify, what so ever, because i am partially blind in one eye. even typing about it makes me want to punch holes in walls and shut-down. i've attempted 4 times since i found out and have tryed anti-depression drugs. i'm too proud, the idea of taking help from other people just sinks me lower, its something i'm really trying to fix. i love to help others, but almost can't stand being helped. i'm not sure why, guess thats how i was built.

thats the gist of the problem along with the normal isolation and such. hahaha, even posting my problems to SF makes me very uncomfortable. i guess i'll just have to change, i'm pretty such the next attempt would have been the last if i deal with this stuff alone.
 
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