molester

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by ballinluig, Nov 28, 2011.

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  1. ballinluig

    ballinluig Well-Known Member

    sorry folks but dont know where to post this.

    im at college n a course for the mental health folk who want to eventually go bac to work. and to put a snip in it theres a bloke who sat next to me again today who is so creepy. he brings back memories of the sick 'so-so' who molested me when i was 12 and its just opened up a can of worms. the breathing i had to listen to, the actions that sick basterd did to me. im n the bloody edge as it is and my support worker wants me to finish college as she reakons its too tough n my mental state atm. why should i give up on something ive been striding for for the last 17 years. this chap at college hasnt done anything to me but he reminds me so much of that bloody day. why do they do it? how do i let go of the demons of what he did to me.
     
  2. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    You shouldn't give up. Could you sit somewhere else? Like somewhere that you can't see him?
     
  3. ballinluig

    ballinluig Well-Known Member

    theres only 7/8 of us on the course. i feel so dirty and disgustingly horrible about my self for letting that chap 32 years ago do to me. its so degradable as a woman to of gone through that
     
  4. justMe7

    justMe7 Well-Known Member

    :( I'm sorry to hear that you're feeling so affected by the situation.

    I don't really know what to say. I know that association is a bastard, especially for events like abuse. The thing you can try to do, before you go in, is that you're going to your class. Reaffirm the reasons why you're there. Reaffirm that the people going to your class are normal people. And strive to focus on the classwork. Id try to have a clear head before you step into the class, even if it takes 5 minutes of waiting outside the classroom. When you enter, the moment you start swaying to past memories and fears, try to re-affirm that they dont have a place in there. That there is nothing to fear, and that you're there for a reason that is very important and interesting for you.

    I think you've got a few things to deal with. One on a long term issue, and the one in the moment. Just, if you continue to go, remember why you're going there, and even if it doesnt work, tell yourself "Fuck it" and fuck those feelings off. And just focus on why you're there. Remembering that he's just a dude.

    Best wish xx
     
  5. crystalclear

    crystalclear Well-Known Member

    Don't give up... You've worked so hard for this. Maybe you should tell the guy that you don't feel comfortable around him and avoid him. Does this guy follow you around? You could also ask some of your classmates or friends to protect you or shield you from the man. Hoping the best for you :)
     
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