More drinking

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by lightning05, May 5, 2016.

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  1. lightning05

    lightning05 Well-Known Member

    I am starting to wonder if I am slowly on a downward spiral right now. In school I have good grades and I got an email about a second interview for a job I applied for, so I'm not really messing up on the surface. But behind the scenes I am drinking and smoking so much. My mood is completely unstable and I revert back to these things. The boredom of not having a job for so long (hopefully the new one comes through), having few friends where I live now, and the depression is building up anger and sadness inside of me. I feel so lonely all of the time. And I run back to my one weakness when I feel this way, drugs and alcohol.

    I know I should avoid them and not do them. I know that when you are depressed they can make you more depressed, yet I do it anyway. Because I know that at least it will make me go to sleep, or distract me while I'm cleaning, or make music a little more interesting. I go outside and take walks and go on runs but all day long I am in a constant battle to distract my mind. I'm filled with anxiety and confusion constantly. I feel like I am going a bit crazy to be honest, but I am trying to keep it together in order to not get committed.
     
  2. ThePhantomLady

    ThePhantomLady Safety and Support SF Supporter

    I'm sorry you are also dealing with this on top of everything.

    You are trying, and I'm proud of you. And my fingers are crossed for the job!!


    Do you have any medication to help you? If anything, then to help you sleep without the need for the alcohol or the drugs?

    One big plus is that you realize this, that means you have a chance to do something about it. Have you considered getting help from a doctor with these things?
     
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