My sexual history is one of abuse, rape and abusive rape. But lately I find myself looking at men and wondering if they would be willing to have sex with me. And I picture it being very violent. Why? I hate what my ex did to me for 20 years and I shock myself with what I imagine. But now as I feel the need to be loved, I am looking for the very thing that hurt me so badly. I'm such a worthless whore!!
Mr. Right?
- Thread starter itmahanh
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You probably picture it violent because, that's all you've ever expierienced. Not all people are like that.. I mean, don't get me wrong, some people are really sick, but some guys can be sweet. Even if you're looking for something that hurt you, it doesn't mean you're a whore, or worthless. It just means.. In a way you're seeking comfort of the only thing you've known throughout your life. It's not healthy, but it doesn't make you a bad person!
Ur not a whore.
one of the sayings I like is..without love we cease to grow, we cease to develop, madeness sets in and then possibly death....love is something that every person deserves and needs, when you have been abused, you look for that in all the wrongs places, you own worth is so low that you feel u deserve any better..you don't know any better.
Maybe you picture it violent as that what you have become used to..you deserved to be held with hands that don't hit and be loved for the person you are.
sorry not making any sense..u are by no means a whore.
one of the sayings I like is..without love we cease to grow, we cease to develop, madeness sets in and then possibly death....love is something that every person deserves and needs, when you have been abused, you look for that in all the wrongs places, you own worth is so low that you feel u deserve any better..you don't know any better.
Maybe you picture it violent as that what you have become used to..you deserved to be held with hands that don't hit and be loved for the person you are.
sorry not making any sense..u are by no means a whore.
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