Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by GoldenPsych, Jan 28, 2011.

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  1. GoldenPsych

    GoldenPsych Well-Known Member

    There are certain songs that trigger me. Not that they are written to be. But when you hear them either you relate or it reminds you. I try not to listen to them when I am bad but then they come up on shuffle and then BAM! That;s it. I am wanting to go. Wanting to harm. Wanting to OD wanting to go. Go where no shit is going on. At the moment one of them is White Lies- Unfinished Business. I love them. They are my favourite band at the moment, have been for the past 18months yet I hear that one song and I want to be where he is singing about. The White Lies are the most amazing band. You people who have never heard of them; LISTEN!

    I spoke to counsellor today. I opened up. I opened up and said things I was feeling that I didn't even realise I was feeling until she fed back to me what I said. Like how I am fighting and fighting. Every bit of every day. One thing I said to her about how I was feeling and the fight was how every time I CROSS (oops caps) the road I think how easy would this be. And then in the split second I have a million thoughts, the 3 main ones; how easy would this be, what if it doesn't work, the person who is driving. I don't actually know what to do. I am so aware of how I am feeling it is affecting my own driving also. I am getting beeped all the time as I am being over careful as there is something deep inside that is fighting.

    How long can I go on fighting for?

    I said this. I said I am scared. I said I don't know how much longer that this continue. Every minute of every day I am fighting. How long before I lose this fight.

    Check out The Fratellis Acid Jazz Singer. Not a trigger one but I am the one in the gutter!

  2. Cute_Angel_Xx

    Cute_Angel_Xx Account Closed

    Some music can be quiet triggering ecspecially if you can relate to it, when your feeling low could you put those songs in another folder so they don't come up, or choose a fil to listen to a song/album you like :hug: x

    P.S I'm glad you opened up at your session and were able to talk about whats happening for you.
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