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My attemps

Discussion in 'After Effects' started by Southwind, Oct 20, 2009.

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  1. Southwind

    Southwind New Member

    First, I apologize for my bad english, heh

    Well, I guess, one year ago I tried OD with Clonazepam. <Mod Edit: Methods>. At time, I was living alone, But I was found by my mom and I woke up in the hospital with a tube in my nose,really unconfortabble. I've been depressed for 3 years, Bipolar disorder too, and every month It get worse. The last two months turned in a very unpleasant hell for me. >mod edit: helena methods<
    Very well, here I'm, alive , But still fucking depressed with no will to live. If i survive my third attemp, I'll make sure to share with you guys.
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 20, 2009
  2. shades

    shades Staff Alumni

    Let us try and help you by talking this out. What is your history with bi-polar disorder? I have had mild BPD for at least 25 years and it can be dealt with. Should you attempt again and survive you may end up paralyzed or worse, but still alive. There is no competition for unsuccessful attempts.

    Maybe it's fate, a higher power or just coincidence, but it seems you are supposed to be here. Feel free to send me a private message if you want to talk one on one. **your English is fine**
  3. *sparkle*

    *sparkle* Staff Alumni

    hey whats happened in the last couple of months? maybe it would help to talk to us more about what is going on in your life :hug:
  4. Southwind

    Southwind New Member

    Well, I'm 21 years old and I'm living alone. My father died back in 2005, but he was an old man already, 73 years old, It was an expected death. My mother lives in her work, she's a nurse and lives in the patient home.
    So, I'm all alone. I've tried a few jobs this years, But I had seriously panic attacks in every ones.Cold sweat, desire to run away, restless. I had to quit and restart my depression treatament.
    Figure that, Living 24h alone, with a fuckin deep depression and suicidal toughts, with no future planning or something like that. I feel like I'm cornered and can't escape.
    I'm missing something. My girlfriend went to Cuba in 2007, to study medicine.She was the only thing I had left. She was the only person who could give me will to live. But now she left.
  5. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Loneliness is a hard thing to endure. Ithink anxiety medication would be helpful
    Is there no way for you to get out just to take a course of interest at a college nothing stressful just for fun. Join an exercise class this get you out and meet new people as well. Iam glad you are here because at least you can talk to people Please no more attempts call crisis line or Good Samaritans when you are low they will talk you through the pain or come here we will talk with you too. Your not alone anymore you have the people here okay
  6. Southwind

    Southwind New Member

    I got better this week
    I'm going to the Gym now, I guess this is helping a lot. I got new medications too.
    I guess that's a good advice, go to the Gym, right in the morning, It will help you feel better for the rest of the day.
    Thank you guys
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